Life — November 3, 1887 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: A DRUMMER'S MOTTO. F when some task you press And meet rebuff in what you seck, Remember, then, the Scriptures bless Whom being slapped shows still more cheek. HE sentiment of Canadian. hotel men is that Jacob Sharp should be let out on bail. ONE OF THE ADVANTAGES— THE CIGARETTE EVIL. CONTEMPORARY which wages war on the cigarette has the following : During the month of August one cigarette firm sold 60,324,- 540 cigarettes. Let us consider for a moment what this means. It would be a cigarette for every inhabitant of the United States, with a few extra ones for visitors. If placed end to end they would extend 2,618 miles, or across the continent from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean, or from Boston to London. Should one cigarette be smoked each minute, day and night, without intermission, it would take 115 years to consume this quantity. We think our contemporary fails to score one very impor- tant point in this awful indictment, and that is, independent of the sinful waste of time in laying out a line of cigarettes 2,618 miles long, if the smoker does not die within the period of time named, he will at least become a physical wreck, useless alike to his friends and himself, before he has completed his one hundred and sixteenth year. This is a subject which requires legislation. 243 THE MARRIAGE NOTICE OF THE FUTURE. FASHIONABLE wedding notice last week gave the genealogy of the bride, as well as the occupation and connections of the groom, his father’s titles and degrees thrown in, and closed with the announcement that so-and-so furnished the decorations. This is what realism is leading us to, But why not carry it all the way through to its fullest ¢xtent ? Thus, for instance: MARRIED. SmivH—Jones.—On the 2oth of October, at No, 4672 Ninth Avenue Vohn P. Robinson, architect ; Theodore Brown, builder), by the Rev. Pierre K. Goodman, author of “ Side Lights of the Gospels,” published by Harping & Brothers, 12mo, cloth $1, paper 50 cents, for sale by all respectable newsdealers, Anna Jones, daughter of Charles P, Jones, wholesale grocer, of 9276 Pearl Street, and sole agent in New York for Spile’s Gurline, fifteen cents per package, and granddaughter of Midshipman Easy, author of the Century's articles on ‘* The Navy at Gettysburg, to Patsy J. P. Q. Jinkins of the Sandwich Islands Custom- House, and son of General Bolivar J. D. Furioso Jinkins, P.P.C., J.A.C.K., C.D. of Her Majesty's forces in Manitoba, Rebellions a specialty, Office hours 6-4. Decorations by J. Kearney, 626 Fourteenth Avenue, third son of P, Kearney, caterer, of 32 Floyd-Jones Street. Furnace-fire by James Higginbotham. Gas by the United Gas Trust of New York. Sup- per and flowers by Blunder, nephew of Lieut. Charles K, Bombastes, of the New York Gazette; terms $1.50 per annum, payable in advance. Conversation at Reception by the World's Entertainment Empo- rium, talented conversationalists and raconteurs, etc., furnished at short notice and at moderate prices, To be sure, this would cost money, but what is money compared with the advantages.accruing from the system ? Perhaps the persons whose business is advertised would be willing to pay for the whole insertion, which would relieve the family of no little expense. We do not copyright the idea. 4 Yyticd2 , Wye KERGO GALLAHER! OF EDUCATION, comicbooks.com