Life, 1886-12-16 · page 3 of 16
Life — December 16, 1886 — page 3: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Page Analysis: Life Magazine, Issue 379 The page contains three distinct pieces: 1. **"Satisfied"** — A poem by Manly H. Pike describing life plans at age 23 (becoming a merchant with ships, a beautiful wife, a palace) versus the reality at 43 (a simple clerk with modest fourth-floor rooms, a wife named Kate, and several children). The satire mocks the gap between youthful ambitions and middle-class adult reality. 2. **"The Spirit of the Day"** — A dialogue between husband and wife about Christmas. She defends the holiday's "divine origin" despite commercialism; he counters that in 16,000,000 years, no water will remain on Earth. The satire targets both sentimental Christmas sentimentality and pessimistic scientific determinism. 3. **"Their Love Soon Freaux"** and **"Whatever"** — Brief items about London divorce court scandals and Indian killings, presented with sardonic tone mocking public interest in sensational news. The illustration shows a Victorian family group, reinforcing themes of domestic life and social aspiration.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
SATISFIED. i \ T twenty-three I planned my scheme of life — I'd be A merchant, toward whose waiting pier Globe-circling ships should homeward steer From Orient and Occident. When millions had been won, I meant To choose a wife of gentle race, Cultured in mind and fair in face ; Build me a palace with each part By art designed, enriched by art ; And, finally, to have one son, Handsome and tall, but only one, ‘Thus I forecast my destiny At twenty-three, At forty-three, How have I prospered? Let me see — I find myself a simple clerk, With light reward and heavy work, Yet, hoping for advance in rank. I owe no man, and have in bank A trifle saved. I occupy Some fourth-floor rooms, which Kate and I Think charming, (Kate's my wife, you know, A pretty seamstress long ago.) We have six girls— perhaps too many — But not for worlds we'd part with any. So kind has fortune been to me At forty-three ! THE SPIRIT OF THE DAY. “ OW marvelous this charm of Christmas time,” said a lady to her husband. “There is something in the very air that thrills, and kindles, and ennobles. How can any one deny the divine origin of the day in the face of this universal kindly feeling, this ‘ good-will towards men,’ that can only be Heaven-born.” “Yes, indeed,” he replied. ‘‘ What is it you have there, my dear?” “It’s the satin lining for the table scarf I'm making for Mrs. Crabapple. She sent me a bureau cover last year with common silesia, and I fancy that when she sees this four- dollar lining, she will feel cheap enough.” ie 16,000,000 years not a drop of water will remain on the surface of the earth.—R. A. Proctor. The outlook for the Prohibitionists grows gloomier every year. Manley H. Pike. THEIR LOVE SOON FREAUX. HE was dreadfully pestered by beaux, Although she'd a retroussé neaux ; So she talked sealskin sacque 'Till none dared to come bacque, Which soon put an end to her weaux. HILE he is about it, Mr. Dana might pay the funeral expenses of those three Alaskan Indians whom George Jones so ruthlessly slaughtered. HATEVER have we done that the details of London divorce courts should be telegraphed over here and published in our newspapers. If not for our sins, perhaps it is to make us duly sympathize with our British cousins in the difficulties under which they labor when they try to be decent. After Dilke, Lord Colin Campbell! Well, cousins, we are sorry for you, we are indeed. comicbooks.com