Life — September 30, 1886 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ODE TO OCT. E month yclept “* Beautiful Sept.” Is nearly o'er. Full soon the street Will be replete With people for The Traveler who on the ocean’s been rocked, The Buds for next season who have to be frocked, The Clerk whose vacation is suddenly docked, And he, whose great-coat all the summer’s been hocked We do greet On the street Every Oct. * * * OVERNOR HILL is still traveling around the agri- cultural districts, and is. pronounced by experts as a show second only to Barnum’s. THE EFFECT OF THE COLD SNAP ON A NEW JERSEY RESORT WHERE THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO MOSQUITOES. * * * HE Pope has issued a decree forbidding the cremation of Catholics. His Holiness don’t believe in running more than one Jost mortem furnace. If we could all be sure that he was equally efficacious in holding back fuel for the other and better known retort, what a corner on Christians the Vatican would have, to be sure. * * * OBACCO chewing is so popular in Illinois, that a move- ment has been inaugurated to change the name of the Lake City to Chew-cago. * * * HE Providence /ourna/ states that the Czar of Russia and the Emperor of Austria drink to each other's health by telegraph. A too oft-repeated bumper of the electric fluid is liable to have a shocking effect on the system. The Emperors should be wary and not look on the telegraph wire when it ischarged. + IEUT. HENN is said to be a fine violinist, but the ac- complishment that a man needs to make him a winner in yacht races is expertness on wind instruments. * * * ERONIMO, General Crook and General Miles are col- laborating on a set of Indian war papers for the | Century. * * a R. JOHN BOYLE O’REILLY has written an ill-tem- pered, discourteous letter to Literary Life, because Literary Life intimated that Mr. O'Reilly's pen would be serviceable at reduced rates. Mr. Elder can afford to regard Mr. O'Reilly's letter with equanimity, and if he-feels disposed he may in reply quote the late John Phoenix, who remarked to an enraged adversary, “Boyle On.” * * * THE FORTHCOMING: MAGAZINE. SOME ADVICE, HE youthful authors of to-day, whose steady complaint has been that the magazines have been so thoroughly loaded with MSS. that there is no chance for the budding intellect, may rejoice in the prospect afforded by the new Scribner's Monthly. This magazine has been started for the same purpose that a safety valve is placed on an engine: to let off the superfluous literary steam of young America. The sad fact that the agricultural and war interests have monopolized the pages of our leading magazines, has materi- ally interfered with the literary aspirations of our youth, and it is hardly to be wondered at that Mr. Howells and Mr. Stedman should indulge in a few rounds on the subject of genius, and question whether there is any such thing after all. The new magazine will soon settle this question as to genius — that is, it will if its accomplished editor is equal to his opportunities. Let him steadfastly refuse to admit the war monopoly into his pages on pain of having the first number of his venture “rung up " by the inevitable chestnut gong. Let him draw the line at “ Home Acres” and “ Lumps of Sugar,” and the Grain Possibilities of Northern Arkansas, and give home questions a chance. Let him eschew the primeval joke of the Editor's Drawer, dropping into his basket the while such delicate squibs as the “Bostonians” and verses of so airy a nature as will leave the reader in a state of blank despair after hours of constant search for a possible solution of a problematic meaning. If Scribner's Monthly will take this well-meant advice, and will not adopt a cover that will be equally applicable to a map of the Bulgarian Troubles, we can congratulate its pro- jectors on its assured success. George W. Me. comicbooks.com PL as “y his the we pro mig