Life — February 25, 1886 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: The owners, when they learned of the English claim, be- came so terrorized at the awful consequences—to England— of a bitter war, were glad to give Minuit a quit-claim deed to the earth for sixty guilders, or twenty-four dollars. Minuit’s innate honesty again came forward, and, modestly declining all right and title to all portions of the globe exterior to Man- hattan Island, closed the negotiations by paying thirty guilders down and promising the rest C.O.D. The date of this memorable transaction was May 6, 1626. The national debt was compromised for five oysters on the heap and a canoe load of tin cans. England's claim was ignored, much to the chagrin of that nation, and various attempts were made to raise a war fund by charging bungage on English beer; but this measure aroused so much internal strife that the Government had its hands full to keep itself in power, much less oust a Dutch settlement from its new acquisition. So without any further opposition or expense the twenty- two thousand acres, comprising what is known as Manhattan Island, passed into the hands of the West India Company. From the time of its investiture with authority the Com- pany prospered, and declared such large dividends that it became necessary to keep in bounds of the law by increas- ing its capital stock. This was done, the Company became the colossal water power of the age. So thoroughly well satisfied were the directors of the Com- pany with the way in which Minuit. had taken care of their interests and conducted their negotiations, that, there being a 119 slight deficit in the Company's surplus that year,-the estim- able Peter was appointed Governor of the New Netherlands in lieu of salary. They were still further actuated in making ONE OF MINUIT’S SALARIED SQUATTERS, this appointment by the fact that Minuit was from Wesel, and the old-time tradition concerning the sleeplessness of such an one lead them to believe that Minuit would be wide awake to his opportunities. The Governor thought so, too, and unanimously accepting the office, before mid-summer had settled down to the routine of his Gubernatorial duties. THE REASON. DO not love you for the pelf Your father lavishly disburses ; 'T is that you are, beside myself, The only reader of my verses. Ernest DeLancy Pierson, TROUBLE IN SHANTYTOWN. 6 OP av the marnin’ to yez, Mrs. O’Tool! An’ is this yer day for resayvin’, Oi'd know ?” “Q-o-0-0! an’ is that you, Mrs. Garrity! Sit down an’ comein! An’ it's glad Oi am to see yez! indade it is! An’ how are yez shtandin’ the cloimate this weather ?” “Och! it’s doyin’ Oi am! Phwat wid puttin’ an me sum- mer muslins an a Monday, an’ thryin’ to kape warm an top ava red hot shtove an a Chewsday, and thin boyin’ oice av a Widnesday, it ’s kilt Oi am intoirely !” “ An’ how's Dinnis, I'd know ?” “Dinnis is foinely ; he's shtruck a job av wurrk over to the crematory an the, Mount av Olives over ferninst Williams- burg.” : “An’ phawt’s he doin’ there?” “ Milkin’ cows an’ makin’ butther an’ chaze, Oi suppoge.” “ An’ phwat’s ailin’ the goat? Niver a wunst did he offer to ran at me whin Oi kim in!” “Och! he’s bin atin’ some doynimite catridges phawt they ‘re afther usin’ down at the quarry, an’ he’s bin low in his moind an’ sollum-loike iver since.” “ An’ are yez givin’ him anything to aise him loike ?” “It’s afeard to mix dhrinks Oi am.” “Och! spakin’ av dhrinks remoinds me that ti-morrer is Washington's birthday !” “And phwat are yez going to give him for a present ?” “Give who phwat ?” “Him as yez was spakin’ av!” ‘ “Oi don’t be afther knowin’ him! Howly mother! an’ how long have yez been in the counthry that yez never heard av him phwat owns the big markit down beyant ?” “Phwat markit ?” “ Washington markit, to be sure! an niver a—Whooroor! there! Shtop atin’ me cloak, ye baste!" And with that Mrs. Garrity gave the marauding goat a sounding kick in the ribs which was immediately followed by a terrific explo- sion. . . . * . . . * After being placed in the ambulance Mrs. O'Tool re- covered enough to say, faintly: “ An’ is that you there, Mrs. Garrity ?” “ Theere is pieces av me here.” “ An’ yez will be afther payin’ fer the goat ?” “ Indade an Oi will not, an’ Oi will have yez up for kapin’ dangerious wepins! Oi will !” “ Shut up in there !" shouted the ambulance surgeon, and then all was quiet on the Potomac. Roland King. comicbooks.com