Life — December 10, 1885 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: “Buy Waby Wuneing.” (From the Prose Works of a French Nurse.] T will be remembered that Gen. Arthur, during the latter part of his Presidential term, became possessed of the idea that the American flag was not good enough to fly above his noble head ; and he accordingly had a novel ensign made for his exclusive use on overnment picnics. This piece of bunting—styled the President's Flag—marked another great event in American history ; and the peo- ple hailed it as filling a long felt want. ‘The result of this has been a Patent Private Bunting Bill, which will be brought before the Senate this winter by Mr. Evarts, Full designs accompany the Act. No.1, THE FLAG OF THE PRESIDENT'S WIFE, On the arrival of that melancholy day when the President is reduced from “ Your Excellency " to “Say, Mister!" this flag can be used as a pillow-sham. No, 2. PRESIDENT’S PRIVATE SECRETARY. The design for this flag consists of a fac-simile short-hand reply to an office-seeker. ‘Veni! Vedi! Vamoose !” No.3. FLAG OF SECRETARY OF Navy. This represents a full-grown interrogation point hovering o'er the deep blue sea. Comment unnecessary. No, 4. SECRETARY OF INTERIOR. Simply an army blanket such as is given to the Indians. The liberty cap for the pole consists of the wig which our Secretary dons on his return from the Interior. No, 5. CONGRESSMAN’S. This chaste design represents the voters’ map of a Con- gressional district, on top of which is a ballot box. The streets are sectional—so is the Representative. The blocks are crooked—so is the owner of the flag. No. 6. SHERIFF'S. Illustrates a personally conducted tour (to the other world). This flag can be displayed, from the windows of private houses, during furniture sales. No. 7, ALDERMAN'S PRIVATE, In the centre is a shirt bosom on which reposes a four- horse-power diamond. Above is represented the migration of the mixed drink—the liquid starting from a goblet, at the right, and bound for the terminal tumble, at the left. At the bottom a life-like representation of the famous five (dollar) finger game. No, 8. CHARITY COMMISSIONER, And long may it wave, o’er the land of the spree, and the home of the knave. The liberty cap on the pole consists of a bowl of muddy water (Poorhouse vegetable soup.) No. 9. GRanp MARSHAL (ST. Patrick's Day.) Hurroo! This inaccurate map represents the country lying between Green-land and Paddy-gonia, discovered by Barney Columbus and Mike Vespucius, as narrated in Roe's “Driven Out of Erin.” The lines at the right represent the Atlantic cables: (A) the Pope's wire, (B) Parnell’s wire, and (C) Victoria's dude wire—the latter, as will be noticed broken (by O'Dynamite Tosser.) No. 10. THE OFFICE-SEEKER’S PRIVATE ENSIGN. We fear this ought not to be included among a list of private flags, for 10,000,000 men will each have one, as soon as this bill becomes a law. The design represents a curs(e)ory examination of the Civil Service Board. . . . . . . After the above are adopted, our good old Yankee stand- ard will be exhibited in the Bowery museunts as a ten-cent curiosity. Wallace Peck. @ Ray, ag EAVICE | comicbooks.com