Life — October 8, 1885 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SIGNS OF OCTOBER. HEN the leaflet red is turning On the trees, And the sun has ceased from burning Devotees At the giddy shrine of fashion Who ‘ve indulgéd every passion From lawn tennis down to splashin’ O’er the seas; When the damozel is eager For the “ whirl,” And nothing can fatigue her— Giddy girl; When the dude devotes attention To his wardrobe’s Fall extension, And we ‘ve got our State Convention Out of curl ; When a vote is worth a fiver When it's hock’t, And the candidate contriver Doth concoct Little schemes to pull his ticket Thro’ the Independent thicket, Then the sun has reached the picket Labeled Ocr. . * Pd R. ECCLESINE remarked of Governor Hill that he was a “ platform in himself.” That's true enough. And he will be pretty thoroughly danced on, too, before the campaign is over. ° : * TT" nomination for Secretary of State by the Democrats shows how thoroughly their goose is Cooked. . * . T'S hardly a fair thing to match the “ Gentlemen of Eng- land ” against “ All Philadelphia ” in cricket. Suppose the E: port all Philadelphia to the other side for a return match ? . . . N Eastern inventor has built an engine so small that with boiler, governor and pumps, it would stand on a gold dollar. The governor must be almost as small an article as our own little affair up in Albany. glishmen win, how are they going to trans- | GPs photographers are now making photographs of lightning. They are said to be striking likenesses. . . . HE latest and most fashionable thing in divorce is the ewport.” No family should be without one within reach. Address, Newport Divorce Guaranty Co. Alimony a specialty. Newport, R. I.—Adv. . . . HE French Minister of Agriculture some time ago com- missioned a professor of the College de France to experiment upon the best method of destroying the winter egg of the phylloxera, it having been ascertained that that line of attack was the most efficient in dealing with that ter- rible scourge of the vineyard. We suggest that in his difficulty the Professor send a case or two of last winter's phylloxera eggs over here to be used at political mass meetings and amateur theatrical performances in the West. We understand that this method of treating unseasonable eggs has often proved efficacious in their extinction. . . . ENTRAL PARK is to have a colossal bust of Wash- ington Irving. by Frederick Beer, an Austrian artist. It seems to us that Beer has been more or less connected with various other colossal busts heretofore. . * . HE Honorable Porte of Turkey is feeling very much embarrassed just now owing to the fact that after having requested somebody to knock a chip off his shoulder, he finds his late Minister of War, Mr. Ghazi Osman, another member of the Pasha family—undoubtedly Turkish for Smith—has mislaid the standing army and its wardrobe. A new army could doubtless be obtained at short notice out of the county jails in the land, but new wardrobes are very ex- pensive, especially such wardrobes as the Turkish soldier affects. An ordinary fatigue uniform in Turkey is fearfully and wonderfully made, and as each fully-equipped soldier has to carry a rug for his tent, a hookah for his hours of leisure, and a basket to catch his head in in case of his decapitation for desertion, the difficulty in which the Porte finds himself is assuredly no light one, Any old bric-i-brac which our readers feel disposed to contribute toward relieving a friendly nation in its hour of need, we feel sure will be thankfully received by the Porte and his Cabinet. Contributions may be forwarded to Abdul Hafiz, Esq., care of Sunset Cox, Bosphorus Flat, Constantinople. comicbooks.com