Life — October 8, 1885 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: a $ESORS ibs A BANGOR man was recently telling of a gentleman at that place who is receiving letters from Generals Hancock, Slocum, Meade and others. Some one present suggested that he could not possibly receive letters from General Meade, as he had been dead for several years. ‘*I don’t care a copper,” was his reply, ‘* if he had been dead all his lifetime!"—Zx. A PRIVATE watchman in New York City is charged with five different robberies. He was on duty but two nights, and this accounts for the few charges.—Detroit Free Press. Brown: ‘Colonel Rosebugle, is it true that you formerly kept a saloon?” ‘olonel Rosebugle (indignantly): ‘* No, sir; never, sir; but,” added the Colonel, thoughtfully, “I have done as much as any private citizen could do to keep two or three of them up.”— Texas Siftings. APPROPRIATE comment: Nurse (meeting young and anxious husband.at the door.) All is well and you are a happy father. He: What is it? She: Twins., He: Gemini!—Boston Courier, WHEN a Washington girl can speak forty words in French, play a little tune for a cent on the guitar, and name six fashion- able watering places, it is said that she is fully prepared to become the wife of a Congressman.—New York Journal, ‘AN article in an exchange is headed ‘‘ Why a Count Shot Himself.” We have n't read the article, but suppose it was because his monkey died, or some one stole his organ.— Norris. town Herald, A BROOKLYN woman tried to drive a policeman out of her house by hitting him with the baby. She should have asked him to hold the infant for a minute.—New York Morning Fournal. LitTLe boy, beware! The good, kind lady who gives you gingerbread to-day, when you come over to play with her little Boys and girls, may be your mother-in-law some day in the rosy future.—Merchant Traveler, TEXAS DOCTORS AND NEW YORK DOCTORS. Tue New York doctors charge a great deal more than do the Texas doctors. Col. Sumpter McBride Sumpter, of Austin, who was quite ill during his recent visit to New York, is author- ity for the assertion. He was in bed three or four days at his hotel, and when the bill was presented he took a piece of paper and a pencil and figured out how much more he had to pay in New York than he would have had to pay in Texas for the same amount of indis- sition. Having got through his calculation he folded his ands saying : “Tam luck: laid up in Texas. ‘Ah !" said the doctor, “Yes,” responded Sumpter, ** for all this money I'll have to pay you I'd have had to be sick in Texas for more than two months."— Texas Siftings, being sick here in New York instead of being HENRY HOLT & Co. HAVE JUST PUBLISHED A NEW BOOK By HUGH CONWAY SLINGS AND ARROWS AND OTHER TALE: J. F. FARGUS, r6mo. Leisure Moment Series, 3octs. Other works by the same author : A FAMILY AFFAIR, 30 cts., paper. CARRISTON’S GIFT, 30 cts., “* Vv IME LATE soap. Cashmere Bouquet Toilet Soap. Has the largest sale of an Perfume novel and excep- tionally strong. Send four cents in stamps to Colgate & Co., N. Y., for sample cake. Ka AKAVER LADIES’ TAILOR, 19 EAST arst ST., & NEw YORK. & Loxpow axb NEWPORT, ¥ Is now showing his fresh novel- tee for the Autumn Season Se. lected from leading Losdon and Farts Houses superfine toilet SOATS. JACKETS vi: STERS. Riding Habits with = their latest improve: BOUND TOGETHER, Tales, 30 cts., paper. DARK DAYS, as cts., paper. CALLED BACK, 25 cts., paper. Leisure Momext Sustes. §B-AU the above may be had in a style fit for the library at $1.00 cach, in the Leisure Hour Series. Aoffead 5. Carsol TAILOR & IMPORTER. “Autumn and Winter” London Novelties in great variety. Also Specialties in Low Priced Suitings receipt of and Summer tion, measurement. 232 West Henriette Frame, ROBES AND MANTEAUX, | takes occasion to announce that she's in choice novelties for Spring umes. Out of town orders receive special atten= Perfect 6t guaranteed on receipt of 220 Street, New York. Lt GARMENTS ARE STRICTLY. TAI LOR MADE asd DE- SIGNED. ‘A perfect ft and sat- isfaction guaranteed. jers by, mail promplly attended to. BUY THE MINIAT! the Bartholdi Statue. Onl, $40 each, D BUTLE TATUETTE OF Address, RICHAR R, Sec’y. 33 Mercer Street,’ New York. PRIESTLEY'S SILK WARP HENRIET TAS Are easily distinguished by their softness and deauty and regularity of finish. They are made of the finest silk and best Australian Wool, and are the most thoroughly reliable goods in the market. and Overcoatings. Exclusive and Correct Styles. 166 Stocth Jove., NEW YORK. Lundborg’s Perfume, Edenia. Lundborg’s Perfume, Maréchal Niel Rose. Lundborg’s Perfume, Alpine Violet. Lundborg’s Perfume, Lily of the Valley. Lundborg’s Rhenish Cologne. comicbooks.com