Life, 1885-08-27 · page 5 of 16
Life — August 27, 1885 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Life Magazine Page 117 This page contains fables and satirical sketches rather than political cartoons. The main illustration shows an "amusing English custom" of climbing scaffolding to obtain ale—a working-class leisure activity the magazine presents as humorously crude. The text includes classic fables ("The Owl and the Strange Bird," "The Hare and the Tortoise," "The Mule and the Small Boy") repurposed as social commentary. The morals critique vanity, overconfidence, and self-aggrandizement among the upper classes. Additional brief satirical pieces mock Boston society ("Boston Culture") and include wordplay about a saucy cook from Vassar and Pascal's toothache. The page represents Life's typical approach: combining traditional fables with contemporary social observation to critique American manners and pretension.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
* LIFE: FABLES FOR THE TIMES. THE OWL AND THE STRANGE BIRD. STRANGE Bird met an Owl and said to him: “Do you know that I can sing as well as Patti?” “My stars, no!” responded the Owl, “I'm so glad I met you.” “Not only that, but I can fly faster than a wild duck.” “ Good gracious !" “Yes, and I'm a high-toned, blue-blooded bird; my meat is sweeter than that of a partridge. “If that is so,” resumed the Owl, “ I see no use of my squan- dering twenty-five cents for a dinner when I can get a free lunch,” and with these words he proceeded to devour the Strange Bird with dignified leisure. MORAL: When you run for President, or Justice of the Peace, don’t claim too many magnetic and magnificent quali- ties in commending yourself to the favorable consideration of the public. THE MULE AND THE SMALL BOY, SMALL BOY once met a Mule, and looking the animal full in the face, remarked : “My dear friend, if you knew what a villainous counte- nance you have, I'm sure you would go and hang yourself to a lamppost.” “My precious infant,” responded the Mule, “I never plume myself on the beauty or configuration of my visage; but if you should once gaze upon the dreamy and Madonna- like loveliness of my hind legs, you would throw up your little hands in wonder and admiration.” 117 As soon as the Small Boy heard this he walked around be- hind the Mule, when the animal, letting drive with both hind feet, kicked him fifteen yards through the atmosphere and landed him head foremost in a barrel of ashes. MorRAL: This Fable teaches that the most dangerous man is the one who hides his resentment. THE HARE AND THE TORTOISE. Hare and a Tortoise once decided to have a foot race (Marquis of Queensbury Rules), to decide a dispute as to their comparative personal beauty. As they started off in the race the Hare took the lead without trouble and soon left the Tortoise out of sight. Feeling certain of victory, he remarked to himself, “I believe I'll lie down and sleep off last night’s headache ; I ’ll wake up before the Tortoise comes in sight.” With these words the Hare lay down on the grass and was soon snoring like a fat judge. Pretty soon the Tortoise came up, and finding the Hare asleep in the road, thought that he could pass without waking him and win the race. The Tortoise was so delighted at the prospect of winning that he began singing, in aloud voice, as he passed the sleeping Hare— “Tramp! tramp! tramp !—the boy's are marching | Cheer up, comrades, we will come, ete., etc.” The loud noise awakened the Hare, and he sprang quickly to his feet and won the race with ease. Morac: Don't hurrah over your plurality before the re- turns come in. HERE wasa young lady from Vassar, Who always for saucer said “ sasser.”” She was cook for the school, But was nobody's fool, For she said that none dared to “ sass ‘er.”” ASCAL suffered greatly with tooth- ache, That may account for the number of his “Thoughts” and their fragmentary nature. For while one is unable to chew, it is remarkable how much he can ruminate, BOSTON CULTURE. ISS DE TEEPARTY : “ And pray, Miss Basbleu, how did you like the illuminated missal in Mr. Huntworthy’s (From La Caricature.) VERY AMUSING THAT ENGLISH CUSTOM, WHICH CONSISTS OF CLIMB- ING UP A SCAFFOLDING IN ORDER TO TAKE A PINT OF ALE. FOR THE BUT THE OLD ONES OFTEN HAVE A HARD TIME YOUNG IT IS EASY, OF IT. collection?" Miss BASBLEU (of Beuseult): “Why, really, Miss de Teeparty, I wasn’t there by gaslight and so can’t say.” HOTTER THAN THUNDER—Lightning.