Life, 1884-07-10 · page 11 of 16
Life — July 10, 1884 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Life Magazine Page 25 Explanation This page contains three separate satirical pieces: **"A Very Broad Distinction"**: A dialect humor piece featuring two African American workers debating petty theft. One accuses the other of stealing a coat; the accused responds that his accuser stole a hen. The "broad distinction" of the title is the satirical point—both are thieves, yet each tries to claim moral superiority. This reflects the crude racial stereotyping common in late 19th-century American humor. **"A Sail in a Cat-Boat"**: A six-stanza poem with accompanying illustrations showing a sailboat passenger's shifting emotions. Each stanza presents brave declarations (I'll have a nice trip, sail fearlessly) immediately contradicted by parenthetical admissions of seasickness and homesickness. The humor lies in this contrast between bold aspirations and reality. **"A Heartless Parent"**: A brief joke where a lawyer father answers his son's question about whether he'd still be a lawyer after death with "For attorneyty" (playing on "eternity"). The satire mocks lawyers as inherently permanent fixtures, suggesting their profession defines them eternally. The page also includes miscellaneous editorial commentary on political and social matters.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A VERY BROAD DISTINCTION. 73 O’ better hide, Uncle Ben,” said “Chuck” De Frost to Ben Mundy, laying down a jug of molasses, to rest his arm, and leaning against the fence. “I should n’t wonder if the ole lady seen yo’ wid dat coat yo’ lugged off last nite.” “G’ way dar,” said “Uncle” Ben, looking up with the whites of his eyes from the onion bed. “S’posin’ I did lug off a coat, niggah; dat ain’t no wuss 'n wot yo’ done;” and he nervously chewed an onion top and began to weed very fast. “P’raps dey wa’n’t no flut- terin’ ob fedders last nite ?—oh, no. P’raps yo’ did n’t tote off a hen? Oh, no, sutten'ly; ob course not !”” “Sho! now, Uncle Ben,” said ‘ Chuck,” looking cautiously around him, “I—I—I might have lifted a hen or two off de perch, jes’ for ‘musement. But yo’ took a coat; dat’s stea/- ins” H. V. S. HINT TO CONGRESSMEN.—When about to address the House, please bear in mind, and copy as nearly as possible, the practice of the cook, who, in preparing a sheep’s head, never dishes up the tongue without the brains. THE champion light-weight—a “ pound ” of steak, A HEARTLESS PARENT. WE would call the attention of the “ Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children” to the following sad case : “Pa,” said Brown’s little Tommy, “if you died, would you still be a lawyer?” “1 guess so,” answered Brown. “For how long?” asked Tommy. “For attorneyty,” replied the inhuman Brown. Little Tommy may recover with careful nursing, but the chances are against him. - LIFE: A SAIL IN A CAT-BOAT. I. SHALL have a nice trip. Of the sea air I'll sip. (What makes the thing tip ?) Il. In this sweet little boat, On the billows afioat, (Where is my rubber coat ?) TIL. I could sail for a year Without any fear. (I'm feeling so queer !) Iv. O’er the ocean I'll roam; I will skim o'er the foam, (I wish I were home !) v. While thé winds moan and sigh And the waters dash high, (I’m afraid I shall die.) VI. ee RRR ()#D* PELtheny Oh, my ! Logan ratification meeting, which offer, owing to the fact that nine-tenths of the audience were Democrats, was rejected with scorn. Prof. Sullivan has been charged with dishonesty for not having the money refunded. This is adding insult to injury, for his share of the receipts did not exceed $5,000, and he said that he would not have had the thing turn out as it did for $20,000. This fixes his personal loss at $15,000. The public should be more considerate in affairs of this kind. After forcing the money upon the eminent gentlemen the demand to have it returned was unworthy of the liberality displayed in regard to the Bartholdi Pedestal fund. We sincerely hope that the public ‘will think this matter over carefully and make all possible reparation to Mr. Sul- livan on his next appearance in this city. In closing by way of apology to Boston and for New York we will say that had Mr. Sullivan employed his usual persuasive methods with the audience as individuals rather than as acrowd, matters would have been more satisfactorily arranged. B. comicbooks.com