Life — October 18, 1883 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

188 OVERHEARD ON THE STREET. RS. A. - Mrs. B. “Oh, you dear creature, I am so glad to see you! “Oh, my darling / when did you get back? Looking so How ‘ve you been all summer? and how's that handsome welltoo! Did you have fun at Mount Desert? Mr. A. as husband of yours? Did you like Lenox? Is the dady good-looking as ever, I suppose? How’s that cherud of a well? How many teeth ’s he got? What a sweetingly child? Hardly dnew youat first, you've grown so much becoming bonnet! Why, your hair's bleached almost a thinner! Ain't you very much pleased ?—and you haven’t shade lighter, hasn’t it?) But I’m in a ¢earing hurry! got a freckle either! Good-bye, love; I’m just rushing up I've been running all ‘round to find a cook. Good-bye, town after a waitress. Mine’s gone away. Do come and dear; come-and-see me-soon.”” see me! You—know—my—number!"” (They separate and fly in opposite directions. Time of conversation, just twenty-three and one-fifth seconds.) H.L.S. bas they rush into each other's arms: QUOTED. “ Alice is but the truth in masquerade.” ETWEEN the dances, she and I Stole softly from the gaslight’s glare And gossip’s ever evil eye, And sought a seat upon the stair ; She, stately as a queen, looked through Her satin mask of sombre hue, And talked, while breaths of summer blew The roses in her hair. Soft compliments in gentle words Slipped lightly from her lips and fell, Like music made by merry birds, Deep in my heart's strong citadel ; And I—ab, how I longed to know What maiden guessed my secrets so ; For when I asked her to hestow Her name, she would n't tell. So when for me she had confessed, Behind the mask, her heart, I laid One hand upon my larboard breast And vowed I'd love no other maid ; Alas, she raised the mask and shut The door of Cupid's humble hut, And lightly said her words were ‘* but ‘The truth in masquerade.” F. D. Ss. A TRAVELLER has thus condensed his impressions of the two English speaking countries: England, cut-tail; America, cocktail. - LIFE: HARK FROM THE TOMBS! OR, A WOMAN'S REASON. A NOVEL, BY Ww—xn D. H-w-Lis All rights reservea. Marquis of Queensberry Rules to Gevern, GROAN THE FIRST. A CAB stopped at No.— Harrison Ave., and a young lady got out backwards with that charm- ing grace peculiar to the ladies of Boston. She was tall and slender; not pretty, but interest- ing. She toed-in somewhat, and was obliged to wear pastern boots to prevent injury from “interfering.” She was just eighteen, and had been so for quite a number of years. Her clothes, considering that they were made in Boston, were not so bad as they might have been. Her name was Clara Louise Michel D’Arkness, and with a bonnet-box in one hand and a Washington pie in the other, she turned to enter the paternal mansion, when suddenly the door was opened from within, and a policeman stood on the threshold. “Whew !”” ex- claimed Clara with the dreamy languor of Boston’s first society. “How you scared me!" The_ policeman smiled and answered, “I've just fetched your Pa home ; he’s got ’em fearful this time, and I put him on the sofy in the library.” Clara thanked him cordially and passed into the room mentioned, where she found that her father had stopped breathing and died, and in consequence, all her pretty new summer dresses would have to be dyed too, and she naturally felt indignant. However, after a light lunch of champagne and red herrings, she recovered so far as to be able to read a letter which she found awaiting her. The letter was from Moses Benton. Now Moses wasa sort of duplex elliptic foster-brother of Clara’s, He had been found one morning floating in a basket on the doorstep, to- gether with a letter of introduction which proved him to be a member of such an old and distinguished Boston family that Mr. D'Arkness at once adopted him. Moses was at present in the U.S. Navy, and was kept very busy training the Government trotting horses at Mystic Park. He now wrote to ask Clara to run out to the Park some day and marry him, as it was very lonesome out there, and he could not leave, as one of his horses was down with the Botts and the other had the Mumps. Clara immediately sent him a postal card, saying that, considering the size of his income, she felt herself in- sulted, and wished him to emphatically understand that she could never be anything more to him than a sister or housekeeper. This brought Moses up to town ina fine mood, and comicbooks.com