Life — August 30, 1883 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

IDYLLS OF THE RING. SAMMY—A REMINISCENCE, A day of gore—a whirl of tooth and nail, When Sammy was to do or die ; to make A spoon or, peradventure, spoil a horn. For things had not been going smoothly as of yore; The Boss was handling Sammy without gloves, And Sammy's back was up for keeps, ‘The blood was in his eye ; his rampant crest Stood stiff and gristly in the tempest’s teeth. And so They shoveled off a stretch near Shantytown— A smooth expanse with dips at either end— And set up railings whitewashed in high art, And carted off the turf for winter use, Until the lists were ready for the shock. Beyant the space thus sacred to the knights The rabble gathered in great strength and force, While on the stand—an artless trestle-work— The kid-gloved friends of Sammy perched, With salts held to their noses, and a thrill Of horror rippling down their haughty backs, As they beheld the mob feed on the peanut wild And mop their brows with ten-cent wipes H Procured au bon marché on Chatham Square. At times a murmur filtered through the crowd, As this or that gave hint of coming deeds ; And once when Sammy, in his far-off tent, Was heard to blow his nose with awful force, Strong men did shut their eyes for fear, Two Biddies fainted in their Sunday clothes, And epilepsy smote a brat like death. But suddenly the Boss’s horn brayed forth, | And Samuel's trampet shrilled defiance in reply, i And straightway, each one from his corner of the lists, j ‘The champions paced forth in glittering mail And swapped a dreadful scowl of hate. AX? so the lists were cleared—the day had come ; Then rose into the summer air so vast a shout As split the welkin into kindling wood, And set the dogs to howling miles around, And made a deaf man over at the Point Exclaim, ** Come in !"’ as though some one had knocked. ‘ eo 8 8 No notice took the bilious Boss of all this row; He simply spat upon his hand and gripped the lance While Sammy waved a new plug hat and grinned Moist recognition at his high-toned friends. ‘Thus stood the two when, from the judge's throne, The signal for the battle to begin was heard, And frantic heralds scurried up and down, With yells of ** Cheese it Then John, astride a sky-blue charger of renown, And Sammy, on a foaming wall-eyed barb, Took place and waited for the fatal toot Which was to launch them in the deadly fight. Sam's eye flashed hectic fire through his helm, And Johnny, through a trifle pale about the gills, Looked meaningly around, as who should say : “Go easy ; there's a hen on in these parts !"” Then came the sickening signal-sound, and then, Like bolts shot from some brawny catapult, Or loafers, lifted by the great Bogardus Kicker, Or anything that’s swift and sudden and spasmodic, The champions rushed upon each other with a yell. ‘There was a horrid, grinding, churning noise, | As when a pumpkin falls and squashes on the stones, And some one shrieked, ‘* He's got it in the neck!" And, sure enough, no sooner had the dust riz up, Then Sam was seen, a-weltering in the dirt. His faithful piebald gave one snort and ran, And broke into a corn-patch not far off, And eat a bar'l of roasting ears foute suite, And all the Tildenites exclaimed Gurroo ! and wept. They lifted him and loosed his wig and teeth And rent his garments for fresh air, and spilt comicbooks.com