Judge — December 29, 1928 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Nense—Look, sir. Bonny twins. Proresson—Congratulations. married! Rufus Poofus Goes Goofus Rufus — Poofus, —_ utilitarian, veterinarian, and humanitarian, was perched on the red, white, and blue sign board on top of the Opera House. He'd been pereh- ing on this perch since Wednes- day. He was hungry, so he ate the perch. Rufus loved fish. He had stolen the perch from a perch-climber. In other words he had hooked the fish. This was known throughout Oodlesbu a fishhook. All his life he had liked perch. He used to lasso them with a lariat. That was easy, Rufus in fact that the origin of the game of perch-easy. After Rufus had perfected this game he wrote a poem about it, it started like this: “Perch-easy enough to be pleas- ant When life flows along like a song.” I didn't know you were —Lonpox Opinion But Rufus Poofus couldn't sing a note. He couldn't Sing-a-pore either for that matter. In spite of this Rufus was pompous. idle moment he had perfe article that today is used through- out the civilized world. He had thoughtlessly pushed the cistern pump through the kitchen door, In and that was the origin of the pump-a-door. Originating things was his long suit. He had two suits. A long suit and suit. His short suit was a law- suit over the acquisition of the extra pair of pants to his long suit. He won the suit, that is. the law-suit, the short suit for the pants to his long suit. That suited Rufus. Rufus could write, too. He could also write three and some- times four. He wrote with a pen- cil, This made him vain. The neighbors said that Rufus was vainy. Pencil-vainy. He mailed a card every Satur- day about six P.M. to his sweet- heart. This proves that it wasn’t Benj. Franklin who founded the Saturday Evening Post. It was Rufus Poofus. Nate Continn a short Storics about movie stars get ting married should end with a comma. —Snank’s Annuan Mother (in train)——Tommy, if you are not a yood boy I shall Smack you. Tommy—You slap me, and I'll tell the conductor my real age. —Nortincuam Tevecrapic “What is the latest news?” “A policeman led a bride : from the ar today.” “What was the matter?” “He had just married her. —Die Muskete, Vienna “Brown said he was painting now and had sold four pictures— he inherited his talent from his father.” “Was he a painter?” No, a picture seller.” —Tit-Bits “Wake up, dear, it's time to take your insomnia medicine.” ANNUAL comicbooks.com