Judge, 1928-09-15 · page 9 of 36
Judge — September 15, 1928 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains two main satirical pieces: **"To the Ladies"** (poem by Arthur L. Livesayx): A humorous male perspective claiming men don't mind being called insulting names—villain, rake, bald, fat, paunchy—so long as they're never called "harmless." The satire mocks male vanity and the masculine need to maintain an image of vitality and danger, even at the cost of negative reputations. **"Fully Equipped Telephone Booths"** (article by R.C.O.): Satirizes the futuristic modernization of public phone booths with amenities like attendants, aspirin tablets, electric fans, refrigeration, and automatic photograph machines. The joke mocks both technological excess and the American obsession with comfort and convenience. The accompanying cartoons illustrate humorous vacation/beach scenes, including people struggling with a kite. The satire reflects early-20th-century middle-class anxieties about technology, gender relations, and leisure.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE To the Ladies Dub me “villain,” dub me “rake.” Dub me “flirt” of “bounder.” zaard.” “parlor-snak “wrecker,” “rounder.” Dub me “ancient,” dub me “bald,” Dub me “past my hey i Though such names Dm called, Every day’s a gay day. y ibly Say I'm fat, no longer fleet, Putty, paunchy, charmless, But, to soothe my male conceit, Never dub me “harmless!” Anruve L. Lireaaxs Fully Equipped Telephone Booths The telephone booths of the fu- % Naterr Nove ture will be more fully equipped Among the real charms of the country are the cow-slips. than the ones at present. Th will be more spacious and will al- ! low elbow room for arm swinging. | A uniformed attendant will march up and down a line of them serv- ing oran; de or, upon request, aspirin tablets. Th will be electric fans in summer and they will be cooled by a central refrig- erating plant. t is during the summer. At no time of year will they be heated artificially; that being entirely unnecessary, what with the natural heat generated during phone calls and the at- tempts to them. In order to induce callers to smile, an automatic photograph- re hine wilt rt of ; The sun was setting; the last vacationist was gone, the resort | ing machine will be part ¢ 1 ‘ ‘ ie ; ec a te Darbo ly was closed; no one remained but the man trying to close a beach | pooth, and it will snap one pie heir. ture for every nickel deposited in the slot. These pictures will be clear and sharp, and every blood vessel in the neck will stand out in them. Then, too, there will be ier volumes in addition to the There will be a hesaurus and a book of similes of names to call people, and to assist the caller in the use of more expressive langu The walls will be of that the scribbled notations may he erased after all the space has heen used up. But best of all, the hooths will be kept in perfect con dition. For the benefit of those waiting in line they will be swept out every ten minutes. “Yes, and I’m darn glad we didn't get any farther—the way —R.C. O. that ald kite was acting.” “Well, we got half way across, an comicbooks.com