Judge, 1928-07-28 · page 27 of 36
Judge — July 28, 1928 — page 27: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page satirizes metropolitan colleges circa 1929. The main text is a tongue-in-cheek "survey" mocking New York area universities: Columbia is criticized for its terrible basketball team despite producing famous athletes; NYU is essentially just a Hall of Fame; City College had a winless football team; Fordham threatens to fire coaches over poor sports performance; Manhattan College's swimming pool serves primarily to supply ice rather than recreation. The cartoons are lighter fare—one depicts someone "aged in the wood" (a whiskey barrel), and another shows an airplane passenger complaining about wind, referencing early aviation discomfort. A separate comic depicts two diners discussing hamburgers served at an exclusive restaurant. The satire targets institutional pretension and America's obsession with collegiate athletics in the Jazz Age, while acknowledging the author's own unreliability ("absolutely accurate. Don't pay any attention to it").
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Aged in the wood. Jack Monrtey, U, of Pittsburgh 30 In Re: Colleges This is a survey of the metro- politan colleges. There is no par- ticular reason for making a sur- vey of metropolitan colleges, ex- cept that everybody is making a survey of something or other. Columbia is the largest univer- sity in Amcrica and possesses the worst basketball team known to mankind. It has become famous as the institution which produced Eddie Collins and Lou Gehrig. It rates with Harvard as a hang- out of the intelligentsia. (Objec- tion from Harvard overruled.) It gives a course in everything, from mob psychology to sales-letter writing. It gives correspondence courses. It confers honorary de- grees in large numbers. It is one of America’s proudest boasts. It is a pain in the neck. New York University is a Hall of Fame with a college attached. If the Hall of Fame had been built where the band stand in Cen- tral Park now stands, there never would have been any N. Y. U. The Hall of Fame is full of busts. So is N. Y. U. The College of the City of New York is a place where you get something for nothing. Its foot- JUDGE ball team once played through an entire season without scoring point. However, C. C. N. Y.'s crew has never lost a race. C. C. N. Y. hasn't « Fordham i: law school in the Woolworth Building. It has a good basket- ball team. By next year it will have a good football team or its coach will get fired. Fordham has a lot of new buildings. Even if they were good, I wouldn't like them. Manhattan jis a college for sons of politicians. Manhattan has a swimming pool. It is used to sup- ply the college with ice. The College of Mount Saint Vincent was founded for the sole purpose of providing Manhattan men with dance partners. Most Mount girls don't know anything. Nobody expects them to know a Cottecr I—Is this an ex- clusive restaurant? Co : 11—Sure—it serves nothing but Hamburgers, —Atrrep Metinorr, U. of Texas °29 anything. They live up to expec- tations. Manhattanville is a college. Barnard is a building, located opposite Columbia. Barnard girls are intelligent. They take courses with long names. They wear glasses. Nobody loves them, Hunter College is the female This report is the result of painstaking effort and research. It is absolutely accurate. Don't pay any attention to it. —Lorp Vanicx, Manhattan ’29 up here without havin’ that (hic) fan blowin’? —Gro. Liciurenstein, U. of Michigan ’29 comicbooks.com