Judge — July 14, 1928 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Are You Going Away This Summer? Many an otherwise charming fellow has been struck dumb the whilst sojourning in Vacationland when the party of which he is a unit asks him if he ean rope and tie a steer, ‘There has been a flush of interest this season in “The Sport of Kings,” as rop- ing and tying the bovines is termed, so I have compiled a few hints that they will fit right in your grip with the pemmican and the saltines and maybe save you that hot flash of embarrassment. What kind of steers are there? is your first query, Well, two kinds, I should say, good and bad. Like, for instance, one day last winter I got a telephone call that she claimed she was a in from the “Windy City fecling lonely, so would Tc up to her apartment on the Drive and while away a rainy after- noon? Being an unmarried man and having seen all the movies in town, I accepted the offer. It turned out later that her spouse was a_ traveling chap named Al Horn, who was in the tinware and adventure-stories game down in Capetown. There was a stri sequel to the epi sode, as it chanced he blew in mnerry JUDGE suddenly from Africa, and there being no closets in the apartment, why I spent the night on a tin roof, which it wouldn't be so bad only there was a cold sleet driv- ing down at the time, and I ha left the young lady's flat without my vest and jacket. this simply as I mention an example of a bum steer. Most roping and tying of steers with the aid of ponies or pintos. with these low these small To get familiar atures, I would fol- directions: You first make a good breakfast off clinical thermometers and then take the subway and ride to 155th Street. Then change to a local and get off anywhere along the line. This called “visiti the is done process is brones” and it will be good prac- tice in associating with animals. Now that you have familiarized yourself with roping and tying the steers, the next question is how to rope the calves. The best quality twine should be used and the knots should be adjusted so that there is no strain on the in- step. (the medi- cal name for strain on the instep) “Langworthy” has washed away a good many people in their prime, so better see a physician if you are not up to snuff. The healthy adult should be up to three snuff at during the least coming semester or know the reason why. Incidentally, the writer saw a little news item in the paper the other day about a hen, that these ats’ mother had died so the biddy ypted the pussies and reared them, What do you think of that for the wonders of modern sei ence, and I guess this is an an- swer to the atheists and scoffers. America has no room in their midst for people that they are al- ways tearing down our ional institutions and ideals, and_ if they can’t shut cp, then let them #0 the hell back where they came from. We have no use here for “Bolshevists,” and, way, how would you like your sister to be nat ized? Besides, they never take a bath, so there you are, times those any- own In conclusion here is a stall poem that my brother in primary school had left over from writing an epic, so seeing we are on the subject, I will let you see how it runs: “Roping the Steers on the Texas Range” Oh, leap in your saddle and whip up the brone, You don’t need no Klaxon for you to cry Honk! Honk! comicbooks.com