Judge — January 7, 1928 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE The bandstand at Dundoon. It Hardly Seems Possible The first time I saw him was a transatlantic liner coming rk from England and I was no less impressed than most of my fellow passengers. ‘ot that we weren't used to seeing wealthy Americans throw their money away on such trips, but this man seemed to have made it a true life’s work and he did it in graceful fashion, In the first place, he and his wife and daughter had taken the royal suite, with about twelve rooms, five baths and accomm tions for about tw peopl but they had also taken add tional suites de luxe for their four maids, three valets, two nurses and a governess. ‘The man was constantly enter- taining and insisted on giving a special dinner of his own to the entire ship with expen and champagne at At the benefits they enough tickets to sell him so they just credited him with a thou- sand dollars, but he turned back all the prizes he won. He didn't wait for the end of the voyage to do his tipping, but when we got to Nantucket you couldn't look at a ste cabin boy without their fairl. bubbling over with smiles, and at least half of the crew had al- ready given notice that they were nt ive favors —Heworist quitting the s voyage. Well, the next time I saw him was about a year later at one of the most at the end of the expensive hotels — in Palm Beach, and he hadn't changed a bit. He had two whole floors of the hotel, had hired a special ballroom there and gave free, and almost public, concerts, lectures and every evening, He struck me even more than before as making it his sole joy dances Scot (reading humorous Jock (dourly) Aye—all at our expen and business in life to find 1 ways of spending money in a handsome way, and he suceceded splendidly. Thad never found anyone who knew just what business he was in or how he had made his money. But naturally [owas even in curious than Thad been the firs time [met him. Finally 1 him give th head porter a thousand-dolla bill one afternoon for his weekly distribution to the bell boys, anc saw when he had gone 1 casually en d the porter in conversation. “Oh, yes, sir” he said. “Mr Abramsteen cor here regular every r. Don't you know who he is? Huh. Why. that's the guy that writes al these here Scotch jokes that's been goin’ so big the last. few rs.” s down —Riecnarp S. Wartacr A la Mode “But I wanted a mannish hat This isn’t mannish enough,” said the pretty girl. soa man’s hat, miss.’ said the salesman, —Lovisvitte Journat The absent-minded professor's latest deed is to. strike and kiss a match. Evenynopy’s We his wife KLY ekly, on holiday)—Jock, d’ye notice wha’ a lot o’ jokes they mak’ aboot ‘catsmen bein’ mean? —Tatier comicbooks.com