Judge — January 7, 1928 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

io JUDGE “Didja read ‘bout this new millionaire ? “Naw, whaddy do?” “Wrote a book on free love and sold a copy to every bach- elor in Scotland.” —Wasiixatox Convans “The first. thing the Scotch teach their children is to catch rubber balls on the first bounce.” —Oi10 Horo Blow Some My Way Editor—You say the murdered man had just taken a long walk. How do you know? Cub Reporter—He hada camel in his hand. —Wasiixetox Dine Three hoboes were waiting on a blind siding to bum a ride. One of them had lost his money at cards. second one had lost his money in Wall Street. The third one was named MacTavish. —Lenion Bern “Let’s play ‘Scotland’.” “How com “Well get tight.” Micitaan Gancovnr McIntrosu—Do ye ken, O'Flannigan, th’ name o’ th’ th’ Scotchman oot a gang o° Irish? O'FLANNIGAN — Shure an’ tha’s ry—"The Miracle.” —Stasxrorp Ciuapparar Aw Please—Just One More- Have you heard about the Scotchman who blew out all the tires on his Ford at a free air station > —Boston Beanpot John has just finished large evening and as he tiptoed into the house rather unsteadily he crashed into the goldfish bowl and sprawled on to the floor. Ah—a voice from upstairs: “John is that you?” w, you gwan back t’ bed—I ain't goin’ t’ leave no damn gold- fish bite me.” —Carxeaik Tren Purrrr “What's the trouble wii that young Scotch col student?” “Oh, he just got a shine and then remembered they were th his roommate's shoes." —Notre Dawe Jraaren Our idea of a mean guy is the musician who put his mother-in law's picture on the drum, —Pirr Pantin Two Scotchmen took dinner together in a restaurant. After dinner, the waiter brought the check, The two sat and talked for a couple of hours conversation — failed, nd they merely smoked in. silence, At one A.M. one of them got up and telephoned to his wife. “Dinna wait up any longer for me, lass,” he said; “it looks like a deadlock.” —Dantsoutin Jack-o-Lantern Scoren Potttictan — Take arwee puff, my lad, and gie me your vote on election. Omo State Sux Dias 8