Judge — April 16, 1927 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE Supursanite (taking city friend home for week-end)—Now, ain’t this better than riding on the stuffy, smelly subways? Two Minds Without a Single Thought “Don’t you think this James Branch Cabell is just wonderful?” “Marvelous, my dear, simply just too awfully cute for words. When did they lay it? You know I think it’s just perfectly astound- ing the way we can communicate all over the world nowadays like we can, calling up London and using this new James Branch cable. I think it was just lovely of James Branch to lay it. It’ men like him that makes us citi- zens proud of them.” “Yes, indeedy, I always say to my father, I say, ‘Father, this is a fast age us girls are living in and we got to live fast to keep up with it, why I wouldn’t be sur- prised if I could get shot to the moon in a rocket before long.’ And father — just answers, “Wouldn’t that be wonderful,’ and goes on reading his tabloid.” “Isn't it the truth, dearie? I always say the trouble with the Y.ANLE SULKED ‘ROY SULLENLY The big value diamond bar- pin this week goes something like this: A fussy egg went into a hash house and signaled a waiter. “Garcon,” he said, “IT want some oysters; they can’t be too large or too small, and they mustn’t be too salty. I want them cold and I want them right away!” “Yessuh!” replied the stout fellow, “and how will you have them, with or without pearls?” This cer- tainly took the carping cus- tomer down a peg. older generators is that they just don’t understand the younger gen- eracity. Now, as I tell me Pa, I tell him, ‘I’m self-supporting, don’t I make $15 a week when I don’t get docked down at the fac- tory for not coming in?’ And he says, ‘You self-supporting? What about the fur coat for $825 I bought you and the stockings and everything and your board and keep?’ So I just don’t pay no attention to him at all and say, ‘I'm self-supporting, but you can’t expect a decent girl to live on what I make. Can you?’ And he just won’t answer me but walks out of the room.” “Can you beat it?” “Ain’t that crust, just?” —Carrott Carroii Rad A trainman is a fellow who helps on and off trains all women under thirty and over seventy- five. comicbooks.com