Judge — January 29, 1927 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE The makers of the Midget Whippet offer you the advantages of a closed car that keeps you out in the open air. Letter from a Boob Abroad D™ Jupce: Well, this is Ver- sigh-uh. That's the way these foreigners pronounce it. I told the guide that s-a-i-l spelled sail, but that didn’t mean anything to him. You’ve probably heard about this Ver-sigh-uh place. It seems they had some kind of a war over here a few years ago, which you may or may not have heard about, and when this war was over the combatants all came here to the palace and signed a funny sort of document humorously termed a Peace Treaty. It was signed on the dotted line in a great big room called the Hall of Mirrors. The mirrors all had a permanent wave, and when you looked in ’em you looked like you do when you get in front of one of those funny ones at Coney Island. The old birds who did the signing had fourteen points when they started, but the room w: so large they lost ’em all before they finished. I found three of the pretti- est ones in a corner behind the table. I think I can use ‘em on the phono- graph at home. The palace was built by Looie the Fourteenth. He’s the guy that had a lot of freak furniture named after him. The queen’s name was Marie. No, not the one from Roumania. This was Marie Antoinette. Marie had a sense of humor. When the mob during the Revolution stormed the palace crying, “We have no DISZY AIDELS They call him Antony because he’s such an easy mark. Judge pays $5 for each one printed. bread!” Marie, who had tried to eat French bread herself, winked and id, “Why don’t you cat cake? That wasn’t a bad crack for a queen. French bread is baked in funny- looking sticks about three feet long and made out of rubber. A loaf of French bread bent in the proper shape makes a very serviceable bicy- cle tire. Out in the backys lot of fountains ins’ said they only played once a month. It was the first time I had ever heard of musical fountains. I asked him if they played saxophones, but he wouldn't answer me. Between you and me, JupGe, I think he was lying. From here I go to Rheims. I will write you from there telling you all about champagne and how it is made, You can expect a graphic description as I shall be full of the subject. Hoping you are the same, Versailles, France. Nate Collier ree “Did you make that face at me?” roared the master. “No, sir,” replied the culprit, “you just happened to walk in front of it.” —Northern Daily Telegraph tet Smuggling through the Customs is an unpatriotic action, says a writer. People who do it forget their duty to their country. —Passing Show te \Nbefe woceen Yes, she is very attractive, but is absolutely ostracized. None of the men will sit beside her or even on the same side of the car. comicbooks.com