Judge — January 22, 1927 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE Gu mbusti Nth by- Arthur L Lippmann OvELY Belladonna Perkins dashed impetuously [ | into the room which she shared with Maybelle Witherington. She was panting heavily from the exertion of climbing the dormitory stairs, and as each hurried breath was exhaled the room became more per- fumed with the delicate odor of denatured alcohol. After thirty-five aromatic exhalations, the canary bird went blotto and fell to the bottom of his cage and the varnish on the bookshelves began to peel. It was a typical modern co-ed’s room, wholesome, Sawdust was liberally sprinkled on the floor and a little brass rail ran all along one wall. There were ten or twelve pennants artistically draped over the sofa and a gold-plated stomach pump stood next to an empty beer keg in the corner. Truly a feminine sanctuary, liberally garnished with those utterly absurd and fragile things so dear to a dainty girl’s heart. “Maybelle,” exulted Belladonna, taking a vicious bite out of a piece of Navy Cut Plug, “H. Dewey Gilch almost said it to-day. What his lips could not utter, his blue eyes proclaimed. To-night is the great annual contest between our dear Three Star College and our hated rivals, Green River University. If Dewey brings victory to dear old Three Star, I shall be his, utterly, completely his, for- ever. How about a couple of dozen drinks?” Maybelle spread a pretty Irish lace doily over the empty beer keg and the girls drank two bottles of Scotch, a pint of Bourbon, one quart of gin, a glass of listerine, two gal- lons of ethyl alcohol and a bottle of milk. The cigarette butts covered the floor ankle-deep when Belladonna finally glanced at her wrist watch and said, “My Gawd, it’s almost time for the game.” tasty. In the distance echoed the first faint sounds of cheering as the loyal Three Star rooters flocked to the scene of the great annual classic. Belladonna rose and adjusted port and starboard garters. She pulled up her chic frock so that a tiny ribbon of pink flesh peeped forth above the northern stocking line. Reaching into her closet, she seized i a paint brush and reddened her thick, warm lips. May- belle appeared with a mop which Belladonna dipped into a gallon can of rouge and liberally applied to her cheeks. Swiftly she opened the door leading to her tiny bathroom and emerged with a bottle containing a carmine fluid la- beled: “Sex Appeal. To be taken as required.” Belladonna gulped three teaspoonsful and poured the rest into a silver flask which she slipped beneath one garter. Then she gath- ered up a large Turkish towel marked “Three Star,” a uku- lele, twenty-five pounds of ice and a raccoon coat. Fully equipped for riot or romance, she posed at the threshold of the room. ‘For the honor of dear old Three Star,” shouted Bella- donna, waving the ice, the raccoon coat and the ukulele. “For the honor of—hic—dear old Three Star,” answered Maybelle as she took up her copy of “Little Women,” by Louisa May Alcott and snuggled close by the roaring fire. Cuapter IT The great contest was on! The six best drinkers of comicbooks.com