Judge — October 2, 1926 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Open air collegiate debate in the Letters to a Fashion Editor EAR Ep: I have been very troubled lately over the question of whether you should wear your handkerchief up your sleeve or in your pocket, also my wife. Please advise me. Ethelbert Eruy: Personally, I never keep anything up my sleeve and if there is anything in my pocket it is a handkerchief, so there you are. As for your wife that’s your problem, thank God. Let me hear from you often. P.S.: Send fifty cents and your old radio and I will send you my new book free on “Why I Failed to Swim the Atlantic Ocean,” with pic- tures. Mister Epiror: I am getting married and need a new suit, or so my girl says, although I told her we might as well save the money be- cause getting married ain’t so much, but staying that way is and besides I still got the long pants suit pa gave me for raising the prize pig. What do you think? Ike Ike: Why don’t you stick to pigs and stay happy, but that’s your look out. It is also bad form to wear gray trousers in September unless between the hours of nine and twelve in the morning a. mM. What was the pig’s name? Dear Epiror: I am twenty-six years of age, tall, with light curly hair, handsome face, athletic shoul- presence of an enthusiastic audience. ders and lounge well. Do you think blue would become me? Oscar Lamebrain Oscar: From your description I think black and blue would become you better, but, unfortunately, you are far off. Travel would be good, too. Why not join the Marines and get a blue suit and lots of things free? Let me know where you come out, if you do. Leonard MacTagart see Slogan for much-married movie stars: Stick to your last. “Is he a low brow?” Who’s Who In History Be Curer Sitting Butt—Who once forgot himself and stood up. Diogenes—Who was paid — by prominent Grecian theatrical pro- ducers to live in a tub. Horatius—Who was a confirmed card fiend. Nero—Who said, “There's going to be a hot time in the qld town to- night.” Gertrude Ederle—Who feels per- fectly safe when motor boating with a young man. David—Who was an old man by the time final arrangements had been made for his bout with Goliath. Chaucer—Who didde spelle verre badde. Demosthenes—Who tried to eat stones. Peter Minuit—Who was swindled out of twenty-four good dollars by an Indian chief. Omar Khayyam—Who said, “A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, and thou, the second of which is the most im- portant.” Ferdinand Foch, Famous French Field-marshal — Who would cer- tainly be out of luck if the letter “F” were dropped from the alphabet. Lawson Paynter ceey The old, old question, “How old was Anne?” has been repla new one, “What model is Li dby a “Low brow! Why you can’t tell where his hair quits and his eyebrows begin!” comicbooks.com