Judge — August 28, 1926 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE In New York a man was set upon by footpads and robbed of his gold- plated false teeth. We hear that after this unfortunate affair he didn’t smile for some time. —London Opinion sae Two British motorists are to tour the world and give jz certs en route. make good Everybody will be anxious to speed them on their way. —Humorist band con- We're sure they will progress. Ral Reindeer milk is delivered in Nome, Alaska, in frozen blocks. Unserupulous milkmen have to go to the bother of drilling holes and inserting icicles. —Passing Shou Riad A parcel of twenty-four pennies, all with holes bored in them and strings attached, was found in Lon- don. One theory is that it belonged to a Scotch visitor who had meant to throw his money about. —London Opinion sae An Aberdonian chemi: went into a shop and asked for three- pennyworth of arsenic. The chemist inquired what he wanted it for. The Aberdonian replied, “Two- pence.” Tit Bits Friend—Certain big one for a dog like that? y a nice kennel, but why trouble to make such a The Henpecked One—Well, between ourselves, the fact is that I want somewhere to sleep myself when I’m locked out at night. A man was recently knocked down by a perambulator and injured. If no horn should give the baby a sharp pinch —Humorist is provided, nursemaids at level crossings. aoe Captain Waterhouse, M. P., says that we import twenty million arti- ficial teeth annually. to think that the only things we can gnash at our American debt are —Punch It's horrible American teeth. Facetious Holiday-maker—Come on, now, you're going to tell me that leg was bitten off by cannibals in the South Seas. Native—No—by mosquitoes. —Humorist Passing Show Things You Might Be In- terested In Men living in the South find it very difficult to remove their shoes without first unlacing them. Psychologists have not yet been able to discover a woman who can yawn with her mouth closed. It is not a common supposition that the Eskimos have long been eating artichokes with a salad fork. Almost all college boys can count up to ten without making a mistake. The boys of Shanghai in China have come to the conclusion that it is impractical to fly kites in the house. No matter how hard they try, the inhabitants of Paris cannot walk on both sides of the street at the same time. Macaroni is very soft and pliable after it has been boiled in water. —London Opinion tae The widow of a farmer had some difficulty with her hens, and wrote the following letter to the board of agriculture: Something is wrong with my chickens. Every morning I find two or three lying on the ground cold and stiff with their feet in the air. Can you tell me what is the matte After a little while she received the following rep! “Dear Madam: Your chickens are dead.” —Tit Bits comicbooks.com