Judge — July 10, 1926 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUD GE “T have to think of $20 worth of name for a nickel sweet?” I broke in. “Please don't interrupt,” Fred broke out. “It is marshmallow in the center and has a coating of figs over which is a shell of milk choco- late, nothing like it.” ‘There wouldn't be,” I murmured. “T'll let you see what I've done so far and put you on the right track,” Fred babbled on as he rose and walked to the blackboard on the wall of his office and wrote, “Bightit (pronounced bite it), Buytit (pro- nounced bite it), Bytit (pronounced bite it) and Beyetit (pronounced bite it”). “Well, let’s trade jobs,” I sug- gested, which would have been a break for Fred for I haven't one. “If I couldn't think of better than those I wouldn't take your twenty.” Which says more than meets the eye. “Here's one alread and walking over to the blackboard with the air of one who has “arrived” I wrote, “Krinchy-krunch (pronounced crinchy-crunch), An Ideal Lunch. You see,” I explained, “that gives your prospect wateration of the mouth because of the chewy noise it makes.” “Rotten!” howled Fred. “It’s soft and doesn’t make any noise when being chewed. I mean the candy, not the name. Don’t ‘ry and explain my sentences to me.” “Well, then, why not save them till they get stale. No, no, no, don’t get sore. I mean the candy too! It When poverty comes in at the door it isn’t always love that flies out of the window. seems a shame to waste such a swell name. arbitrary, how's But, if you will be this?” (Ar nother trip to the board.) Hibble-de-Bibble, a Peachy Nibble.” “Marvelous, my This eulogy from and unsolicited. ear brother.” red, personally “Your interest in the field of belles lettres and meta- physics is, most certainly, advertis- 1M ofr T mat (| a] | | A couple of fellows who said that “Marriage doesn’t get you anywhere.” ing’s loss. I will call up the factory immedi; ely and ask them to change the fig filling to peach, at once.” The sarcastic bum! I tried to explain that “peachy” was just colloquial for dandy or hotsy-totsy, but he couldn't see it that way. “How about Buttery-butty, Nice and Nutty?’ I asked, somewhat chastened at my rebuffs, but rather confident this time. “So’s my young brother,” was all Fred could say. “Listen, kid, get this! They're not designing a candy to fit your slogans. You're design- ing a name to fit their candy. There's no nuts in this hunk of glu- cos “Wait!” I screamed. want to appeal to men?” “Why not, if it’s possible,” was the enthusiastic answer. “Then you might as well get out the old roll because here comes the prize winner. You do not have to be a subscriber to enter this contest. You may find the magazine in any public library— “Go on! comedy!” brother. (Continued on page 24) “Do you Go on! Cut the This from my fun-loving comicbooks.com