Judge — March 27, 1926 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘a way to deal with the unspeakable Moxie. At first I strove to dodge him; but it was no use. Run from him as J might, I found the man omnipresent. Then I tried the plan of meeti his salutation with a surly silence. But silence only gave consent, and the jackanapes went on his way more arrogant than ever. Finally, this day last Monday, in a burst of inspiration I did for him. I hadn't planned the grand coup. In fact, save for one trifling item, Thad given up planning; but, as I found on this Alice-bluie Monday morn—an ounce of inspiration is worth an ocean of cerebral sweat. “Hello!” he said, giving me the two-ton squeeze with his clampers. “And how are tricks? And how are all the folks? And your dear mother? And sister Sue? And the baby? And how is Uncle Ignatius? And how is your brother Bildad?—"” Without a word, I let him run on and on through the entire list. Without the slightest resistance, I let him squeeze my fingertips until he dropped them from sheer ex- haustion. Then, when he was com- pletely done, I pounced upon his fingertips, and took them to me, putting on all the power that I had acquired in a recent. physico-corre- spondence course taken for the purpose. Then, in thunder, made I reply: “Well, well, well, Old Beezer, Old Squeezer! I can’t tell you how tricks are, until you tell me who they are, or what they are!—but I can tell you my folks are feeling mighty wretched. Uncle Ignatius has lumbago, Aunt Sara has a sicl: headache, the baby's got the colic, mother’s indisposed, Cousin Albert is in jail, I'm feeling rotten, and you're looking worse!” Hiram Jonathan Moxie has lost his punch. I passed by him. this morning, and the best he could give me was a frightened nod. Honestly, he looked sick. I myself am feeling grand, Cyril B. Egan sae “What’s the shape of the earth?” asked the teacher of Johnny. Johnny said it was round. “How do you know it is round, Johnny?” Then Johnny replied: “All right, it's square, then. I don’t want to start an argument about it.” —Answers accents — of AHH A postcard from Copford, Essex, has reached its destination, a quar- ter of a mile away, after fifteen years. Evidently the sender did not heed the post office request to post early in the di London Opinion Interview _ the Stars! Make Money Writing for the Movies Be a... Special Interviewer Screen News Reporter Motion Picture Critic Money making, interesting careers are open in the motion pidture industry to men and women who have the ability and train- ing to write. New talent is sought for many types of writing positions, such as publicity work, reporting for motion pidure trade papers, special interviewers for movie mag- azines, editorial positions and scenario de- partments of producing companies, etc. Trained Writers Monopolize Movie Field Do you like to write? A whole new world, full of interesting personalities and unparalleled rewards, awaits unfoldment to trained writers. This is the Golden Age for trained writers in every form of literary endeavor. The enormous increase in pub- lishing business keeps editors alert for well-written matter of all kinds. More basically than any other training, News- paper Writing prepares you for authorship in photo- playfiction and article fields. Newspaper men and ‘women virtually monopolize the movie field wher- ever writers are needed. Publicity Representative Continuity Editor Photoplaywright The Newspaper Institute of America is prepared to train you, by easy study at home, thoroughly and practically in newspaper writing, the key to success in all writing. When you are trained, you can use your newspaper writing background to carve a splendid career. | Have Your Ability Analyzed Free If you would be interested in knowing about the great opportunities for spare time and professional writers, and want to know whether you possess in- nate ability as a writer, send for our Writing Ability Chart. Investigate at Once this offer to train you for amoney making, interesting career. Usecoupon below. ot ees eee eee eee 1 Newspaper Institute of America, Dept. 42. 123 West 45th St., New York Piease send me your Free Writing Ability Chart and further information regarding the money making possibilities for trained writers. Name City Occupation. Wifey—Fancy you buying that loudspeaker! The people under- neath worry us nearly to death with theirs! Hubby—Don’t worry, dear—THIS IS IT! —Passing Show 29 comicbooks.com