Judge — August 29, 1925 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“Why the scarecrow habiliments, Hamlet?” “Great Dane in the morning! Cymbeline, to keep birds like you off my corn, of course.” -—Wituiams Purrte Cow PID Prof—What is it. that human beings have that none of the rest of the animal species have? Student—Halitosis, —West Virginia Moonshine The Hussy Where’er I go, where’er I turn What boldness do I see. The girls to-day will never learn To show their modesty. T’ve seen the girls with dresses short And hose rolled to the knee, And others still who make their forte Just sheer transparency. — But, sight of sights, I saw to-day, A brazen thing unfearing— A shameless damsel, blithe and gay, Who left at home each earring. —Amherst Lord Jeff PID “Who is the greatest modern ex- ponent of his native dialect?” ty ——f “Come across now. Where did you put them diamonds?” “I shoved ’em back, sir.” “Back where?” “Back with the rest of the deck.” —Pitt Panther “TI hear you’re keeping a keg of beer in your room.” “Yes, I’mtaking it to gain strength.” “Any results?” “Marvelous! When I first got the thing I couldn't even move it, and now T can roll it all around the floor.” —Yate Recorp es He CHEER Cr. Another Flash “Whither away, stranger? What wouldst?” cheerioed St. Peter, as he leaned over the pearly gates. “Gosh, let me in,” muttered the wandering soul of convict No. 999, just released from the electric chair, “IT just had the shock of my life.” —Colgate Banter SID “Jane reminds me so much of a public office.” “How so?” “She’s always secking the man.” —Michigan Gargoyle Drama in One Act She—Well— She—You’re rather shy. He—I haven’t a cent. More silence. She (desperately)—Oh, dear! He (in ecstasy)—Helen! And so they were married. —Lehigh Burr —Norre Dame Jucc.er » comicbooks.com