Judge — August 29, 1925 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Ceciu—I never go very deep. Mary—Well, what's the matter? expect you to, Little Travels Breezing Through Holland tke the ex-kaiser, we reached Holland safely. Holland is so low it is really part of the North Sea. It was discovered many centuries ago by a deep sea diver. The higher (the tide, the smaller the country. Our guide pointed out the great dikes and told us that once, when one of them sprung a leak, a Dutch Paul Revere rowed through the countryside and warned everybody to put on their bathing suits. We visited Rotterdam, Amster- dam, Schiedam, Veendam, Zaandam —in fact, we visited one dammed town after another. Then we took a crosstown canal boat for the interior. We enjoyed the breezes. One thing the Hol- landers can blow about is the wind. The windmills are always working. They pump the water from the land into the canals. The sea keeps pumping it back. There’s perpetual motion for you! Pussyfoot Johnson went to Hol- land to dry it up and they told him he was crazy. Besides, they said No one who had met you would SEEING AMERICA WORST they had enough windmills there alread ly. Holland is noted for its cheese. The biggest piece of cheese there at the present time is the ex-kaiser. In Holland a pants presser would starve to death. Little Hans wears his pants baggy. When he wants a new pair of shoes he goes to the car- penter. Our guide informed us that it is not easy to obtain good foundations for buildings, and so many of the natives live in boats. These boats, unless securely fastened, move about with the current. This makes it extremely difficult for the Dutch letter carriers. As we sailed along the canal, we noticed that we were higher than the fields on either side. When a Dutchman wants to get a good view of the surrounding country he doesn’t climb some hill or mountain because there are none. Instead, he climbs into a rowboat on one of the high We saw women washing clothes in the main thoroughfare. Holland is noted for its cleanliness. With so much water and Old Dutch Cleanser it couldn’t be otherwise. It’s a great country for painters and artists. Even the horses draw canal boats. After pulling that, we left the country. Robert Cyril O’Brien Truth Is Stranger Editor—Your story is beyond the bounds of possibility from start to finish. Author—You can’t make me sore. I'll sell it to a True Confessions maga- zine! Densest popula- tion, per capita, in the United States. comicbooks.com