Judge — August 22, 1925 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Professor (to his old cook)—You have now been in my service for twenty-five years. As a reward for your true and faithful service I am naming a new bacterium after you. —Klods Hans (Copenhagen) a mustache, and does his best to act like a no-account count (but I knew him anyway), and offers him an un- tidy sum to marry Eve and force her to sell out. But our count suddenly goes democratic, weakens, falls really- truly in love and—oh, what's the use! “Never the Twain Shall Meet,” the other one, is the Peter B. Kyne story of the same name and is 100 per cent. cinema. It sets out to prove that the “East,” as personified by Anita Stewart, a South Sea prin- cess, and the “West,” exemplified in the shiningly aggressive and business- like countenance of our inevitable hero, a wealthy San Franciscan in the import business, can never twain. What it does prove is that they can so! But you have to know the ropes. In the course of his business Bertie acquires the guardianship of the half-caste, Tamea, in which part Miss Stewart gives a most convincing in- terpretation of Anita Stewart with a marcel wave and three gallons of walnut stain to her credit. She steals the honorable M. Lytell from his former effete sweetheart, after it is convincingly proven that a half-caste South Sea princess can- not be assimilated by San Francisco society, and they go back to her lil’ island to get married in true Hawaiian fashion. But they don’t make much of a go of Polynesian life together; for instance, he forgets to shave, so Anita sends the weak-willed Bertie back to his occidental love and re- ceives in exchange the undying devo- tion of Huntley Gordon (which seems to be a bargain to me), whom she said she hated, but of course was just joking. The title, “Never the Twain Shall Meet” is disproven at least once in each reel and twice in the first and last ones. And the subtitles, written personally by Mr. Kyne, are dreadful. “The Ranger of the Big Pines’ is another piece of soft wood. It was obviously made simply because some one had twelve horses, a half dozen assorted 45's, a cabin in the woods, eight back drops of the Sierra Nevada Mountains and a lumber- jack shirt. The shirt belonged to Kenneth Harlan, so they let him act in the picture. This can be listed among such honors as member- ship in the National Geographic Society. Helene Costello was simi- larly honored. It must have been her cottage. She does look like’ her dad. However, there’s a little bit of good in every bad little film— usually—and in this instance it is the sterling work of Eulalie Jensen as a hard-boiled frontiersman’s widow, or a ‘frontiersman’s hard- boiled widow, or both. Next week! The great celebra- tion on the eve of Greater Movie Season! “Course ’e is! Can’t yer see ’is shirt on the line?” —Gaiety Pll Show You How FREE Give me thirty minutes of your time, and I'll teach you more about playing piano than you can learn in two weeks studying by any other method. YES, I'll do just this, and won't charge you @ single penny for the instruction. Just. fill out the coupon below and mail it today—and I'l send, you an interesting sixty-four page booklet, “How to Learn Piano or Organ,” and two lessons of my course, absolutely free. No previous training necessary to study my way. I start you from the very beginning— yet in four lessons you will begin playing pisses from notes in every Key. | You don't ave to spend years, and hundreds of dollars to learn how to play—you can learn in quar- ter the time ordinanly required, yet pay only a few cents a lesson. Remember, however— that you can obtain the first two lessons of my course absolutely free—by mailing the coupon at once. FREE LESSON COUPON QUINN Sree, 3 Columbia Rd., Bo: Please send me, without cost or obligation, free booklet, “How to Learn Piano or Organ.” free sample lessons and full particulars of your method. Name. “I KNOW YOUR FACE BUT ---” How many times do you have to make this admission? ‘There is no real reason why you should subject yourself to the embarrassment of admitting that you are unable to remember names. It is the man with the ready, reliable memory who impresses people, it’s the man who remem- bers faces, names and facts who is able to com- mand respect and salary. If it is necessary for you to meet people every ¥ you owe it to yourself to develop your latent powers of memory. POWER and FORCE William Clarke Will in a simple yet practical way show you how you can remember names and faces and how to read character in the head, face, eyes, nose, mouth, ears, hands and handwriting vill ive you in sixteen (16) handy pocket sized lets fully illustrated, the secret of personal Power and Force through the practical applica- tion of memory. A limited edition of this remarkable work is available for distribution among readers of JUDGE. Sets will be sent postpaid upon receipt of $1.00 JUDGE BOOK DEPARTMENT 627 West 43d Street New York comicbooks.com