Judge — August 22, 1925 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

New Arabian Nights The Queen of Kleptomania ESIDE a crooked little stream in the far-off kingdom of Klep- tomania there once lived a beautiful and talented young lady shoplifter. This strange country, inhabited entirely by thieves, was ably ruled by the biggest crook of them all, one King Robin (affectionately known to the natives as Rob, the Kind-hearted). Now it happened that the king, lonesome among the pickpockets, wiretappers, burglars and bandits that formed his court, sought a bride, and, having heard glowing reports of the prowess of his lovely subject, determined that she would make an ideal queen; one who would be re- spected by every kleptomaniac. The girl was brought handcuffed before his lowness, and the marriage indictment was read to her. At first 7 she pleaded “not guilty Insurance Fienp’s Wire—I hope you are keeping up your alimony upon the advice of couns insurance. I want to feel that, no matter how you are taken off, I would her plea and received a life sentence. be better fixed without you than with you. Things went well for the couple until the king started to miss cer- INSURED TO THE GILLS tain valuable articles. He knew that it was not nice for a husband to by Don Herold suspect his wife, but what could he piscovene the other day that estimated that if all the things hap- 4°? : the premiums I pay out an- pen to me against which I am in- Too late he realized that the game anally for varloul kinds of (Coutanaad a papas) can’t be beaten. R.C. OB. plain and fancy insurance total exactly $1,723.42 more than my annual income. I don’t know how I live. I had sat down to figure out in cool gore whether or not I could afford a very charming policy which an agent had just put up to me—a moving insurance policy, a policy which would insure me against ever being foolish enough to move again and which would, in case I ever moved, reimburse me fully for cost of moving and for injury to my furniture and sensibilities. This was just the next day after Thad taken out rain insurance. You see rain is quite depressing and is therefore very harmful to my busi- ness (drawing funny pictures and writing hilarious articles for maga- zines and newspapers). (I am also covered against general depression by a special depression insurance, which pays me liberally for every day I don’t feel funny.) Of course I know I am a little cranky on insurance. I recently —e——EE comicbooks.com