Judge — August 8, 1925 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A ge Here lies a man named Sir Oliver Blair. He shot himself for cheating At solitaire. ahaha 4 dt ay len tte pays 35 fOr €0Ch one pr Choose Your Career Now! ‘ov can be a director if you are fond of black cigars, and can afford to spend the afternoon sitting around a long mahogany table look- ing through piles of papers for the one you left home. You must de- velop a rather prominent stomach and play golf frequently, though under no condition must you exercise at any other time. The only differ- ence between a bank director and a railroad director is that a bank direc- tor sometimes wears yellow spats, whereas a railroad director has a daughter who marries the telegraph operator at Huskins Falls, Neb. Directions for Directors It is essential that you should know how to sketch, so that you can occupy your time while the other directors are talking. Really enter- prising directors’ meetings will be supplied with white blotting paper. soft black pencils and a common rubber eraser; and if you are not able to produce a series of diamonds joined together, a good round of con- centric circles, or the profile of the little chap two seats to your right, you may as well give up and go out into business. Suggestions for sketches in case the directors’ meet- ings last over ten minutes include: Abraham Lincoln, landscape with birds flying, several long spirals, Napoleon Bonaparte, and the ground plans fora labyrinth. Directors work as follow: hey appoint a committee, which divides itself up into three sub-committees, which appoint special committees, each of which in turn appoints a committee of one, consisting of the director who is absent. This is why you should attend directors’ meetings. Corey Ford A, ‘‘sive a sentence with the word Scenery and 4 Horizon” Es “When he scenery 7 64 liked horizon hair.” The telephone door More people enter our homes and offices by telephone than in person. Through the telephone door, traveling by wire, comes a stream of people from the outside world on social and business missions. Important agreements or appointments are made, yet the callers remain but a few seconds or minutes and with a “good-bye” are gone. We go out through our telephone doors. constantly to ask or give information, buy or sell things, make personal calls and on dozens of other errands. None of the relations of life is more dependent upon co- operation and mutual consideration than these daily millions of telephone journeys. It is the telephone company’s part to fur- nish the means of calling and to place courteous and intelligent employees at the service of the public. Good service is then as- sured when there is a full measure of co-operation between users. Only by mutual care and consideration can everyone enjoy the full pleasures and benefits of calling. Telephone courtesy is for the good of all who use the telephone door. AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES BELL SYSTEM One Policy, One System, Universal Service His Mistake Jean—So Tom and you are to be married? Why, I thought it was a - mere flirtation. Joan—So did Tom. —Sydney Bulletin Some Nerve A hardened motorist ran down a pedestrian. “Hey,” he shouted; “while you're under there, take a look at my brake rods,” —The Luptonite 23 So Would We “I'd be much better off if they’d put that sign on the mail box.” “What sign?” “Post no bills.” —Mutual Magazine Nothing Else Mattered Porter—This train goes to Buffalo and points east. Old Lady—Well, Iwant a train that goes to Syracuse, and I don’t care which way it points. —Everybody’s comicbooks.com