Judge, 1925-02-14 · page 12 of 36
Judge — February 14, 1925 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Explanation for Modern Readers This page contains two separate humor pieces from *Judge* magazine: **"The Absorbing Adventures of Professor Blotter"** is a comedic serial about an eccentric inventor. Professor Blotter creates an absurdly overcomplicated furnace apparatus that supposedly harnesses shaking energy to wind clocks, grind coffee, and mix cocktails—satirizing unnecessary mechanical complexity. The joke culminates when he injures himself on a clinker (coal residue) and proposes the solution of making clinkers from inflammable material so they burn away—defeating the entire point of removing them. **The cartoon at top** shows a couple being startled by an intruder; the wife mistakes a burglar for her father—a joke about in-laws being unwelcome or unpleasant. **The "Krazy Kracks"** section features brief, groan-worthy puns about the word "flotilla." **The final jokes** reference Volstead (the Prohibition-era politician) and a statue placement pun involving Patrick Henry's famous "Give me liberty or give me death" quote—likely suggesting ironic placement near alcohol-related humor during Prohibition.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Absorbing Adventures of Professor Blotter ROFESSOR Biotter, who discov- ered the first can of sardines which could ever be opened with the original key, has celebrated the cold weather by turning his attention to furnace problems. As an example of the efficiency for which the professor is famous, he has invented an apparatus which may be attached to any furnace. This in- vention harnesses the energy ex- pended every morning in shaking the furnace and uses it throughout the day to wind the clock, grind the coffee and mix the cocktails. Blotter was puzzled when he first moved out in the country by the assorted furnace implements inside his coal bin, including a full set of pokers from mashie to niblick, and something that looked like a com- bination egg-beater and metal bath spray, except that it was lined with felt. However, the professor was not slow to catch the idea and his present equipment includes his own Blotter Furnace Implement—a gigantic piece of mechanism worked by intricate levers and clutches, with Tue Lover—Th-thank heaven! LY “RACKS me 4 sentence with the word P flotilla.” ae “I got along fine with flotilla “nother fella cut me out!” “There's Dottie Duck, the composer of that popular ballad, ‘Waddle I Do?" (eae — It's only a burglar—I thought it was your father. a number of iron gadgets up and down the stem, and a ed handle terminating in a long piece of wire, on the end of which is a small brush like a whisk broom. Inasmuch as this little brush may be used now and then in dusting off the shoes after emptying out the ashes, Blotter declares that the whole implement is just as indispensable as any other one of his furnace tools. Blotter had his first’ encounter yesterday with a clinker, in the course of which he received, in addi- tion to a broken collarbone and lacerated hands, an inspiration which promises to revolutionize all clinker hunting in the future. “My solution is simple,” declared Blotter. “I merely propose that all clinkers should hereafter be made of an inflammable materi. will burn up and get out o ; I think,” he added, “this settles the problem entirely.” Corey Ford Cael Higgs—Where will they put that statue of Volstead? Biggs—Right in front of Patrick Henry's. comicbooks.com