Judge — August 30, 1924 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

XUM The Bird House (Continued from page 10) it, what’s more it was nonsense, and that T'd hear no more, please, about bird houses. Angela’s eyes filled with tears, hut she said nothing. The bird house arrived in the mails a week later. We examined it together, exploring one room after another. Angela pointed out. the second story. “One moment,” I interrupted. “Did nu ever see a bird walk upstairs? Be- se otherwise that floor’s no good for renting at all “Oh, they fly in and out the windows,” explained Angela. “It’s like Thomas Jefferson’s home at Monticello.” “How odd!” I said. “The idea of Thomas Jefferson flitting in and out the windows at Monticello. Why, there'd have been no privacy. “It says this side porch is an exact copy,” continued Angela, ignoring me. “The birds will. love it!” I enthused. “I can just see a robin sitting out here in his smoking jacket and_ slippers watching where we plant the seeds in the garden below.” I was carried away with the idea. “Or a che-wink promenading the conservatory and singing to him- self{—” “Let's get it up,” rather brusquely. “If you could be in- terested in giving me a hand with this twenty-foot pole—" Angela and I got the pole to stand straight in the air, and she steadied it while I poked an end of it into the soft earth. Then we stood holding it. “What comes next?” I gasped. “Hammer it down,” she ordered. 1 looked up into the air and calculated the reach I would need. “If there only another pole standing next to th I said, “I could shinny up and hammer this one into the ground from the top of it. But then, on the other hand,” I interrupted Angela went on, “there wouldn’t be any need of hammering this one into the ground if there were another pole already standing next to it.” It was Mr. Simpkins next door who suggested that we dig a hole first and pack the dirt around the pole afterwards. Two hours later we stood off and admired | the effect with pride. “And now,” said Angela triumphantly, “now to get the bird house up on top!” Mr. Simpkins excused himself and left ” I said after a long silence, “we'd only have gotten sparrows anyway. I'd have been obliged to go out and whistle like a rose-breasted grosheak in order to attract any decent clientéle.” Angela nodded. “In the second place, I'd have been forced to shinny up and down this con- founded pole every time we wanted to change their water, or bring them suct.” Angela sighed. “And in the third place,” I concluded, “this pole would be an excellent thing to | train scarlet runners on.” Angela turned away. That evening the little Simpkins girl next door had the extraordinary good for- tune to find a brand-new doll’s house abandoned on her back porch. Corey Ford A Hypothetical Case The Policeman—What do you think caused his death? The Wife—He was a very absent- minded man, perhaps he forgot to breathe. —Le Péle-Méle (Paris) Still the Old Eve “Why did you come to this awful | place for your vacatio “My dear, you suggested it yourself.” “Yes, but why did you agree?” —The Billetin (Sydney) AG a te Ml Victim (awaiting his turn with the dentist, and bored with ancient papers provided)—I say, I rang to ask you if you’ve got The Times for April 29, 1905. It seems to be missing. —Humorist (London) a Saxophones , Get Together Talk about fun! And good music! There is always plenty of both when two Buescher Saxophones get together, __dfyoulike good music— if you want to be popul —if_ you want to fourhome the center of attraction, you must hav Buescher Saxophone. Easy to Play—Easy to Pay With the aid of theyfirst three lessons, which are (upon request) without charge with each phone, the scale can be mastered in weeks youcan be playl ‘ing pular music. Youcaneven | take your place in a band of orchestra within 90 days, if you so desire. Free Saxophone Book—Just send a post card for your copy. Mention any other instrumentin which you areinterested and completecatalog willbemailed. (106) BUESCHER BAND INSTRUMENT CO. Bis Buea Band and Orchestra Instruments 243 Buescher Block Elkhart, Indiana in Cash for you forl0 weeksWork! , Outfit Free By Return Mail tho sparet of making bi wi grones pe Ghee 816 iene Wi Madent de-to- Sep 3150 Bipelarogl bettrstle bettenaaay: Reena eerie BIG PAY—PARTORFULLTIME! 4 Bony ofmy moet successful Agcntegtartcd tine, Now they own a permanent business WRIGHT & CO., Address Dept. L-100 Haris, Tirwp and Congres Stet, CHICAGO ‘Bik Sit Protect ‘yourself again inst jold-up, Fowdies, etc. with this clever cigarette case, of light weight metal, exactly like the real thing en the trigger, back files the lid showing your cigarettes. Lots fun scaring your friends, and a great ose W's HS ATION pre ats cue ATION, rev res formation of WASTE in in Demineralized, eause discase, from wit iducational booklet 10 cents. Eults- Over 6.000 pupils. BRINKLER SCHOOLOF Dept. 1 131 W. 72d Street, anne Cortez CGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST— comicbooks.com