Judge — August 23, 1924 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“Chow,” cried the hungry bum who mistook the mah jongg tiles for Fig Newtons. —Stevens Tech. Stone Jug rey It was in one of those little Penn- sylvania restaurants and the waitress was one of those little Dutch people who use peculiar ex- pressions. Said He—What kind of pie have you? Said She—Black- berry and apple. She returned a min- ute later. Said She—The black- berry pie is all. Said He—All what? Said She—‘‘All apple.” —Penn State Froth Rad Officer—Sir, you must accompany me. Drunken Banjoist— Allri’; what are ya goin’ ta shing? —Wesleyan Wasp Fae Medical Oficer— Would you come to me for such a trivial com- plaint in private life? Private—No, sir, I should send for you. —Columbia Jester Par **What’s your name?” “T don’t know.” “Why not?” “Mother and father died before I learned to talk so they could never tell me.” “Well, isn’t is written down some- where?” “Oh, yes—but I am a Czechoslo- vak.”” —Mass Tech. Voo Doo PIe Student of History—Dii Teibnitz started calculus? Student of Technology—I wouldn’t you know be at all surprised, I started it my- self. —Stevens Tech, Stone Jug Pao She (a lover of animals)—‘Ah, what would polo be without dashing ponies?” He (sadly) —Hockey. —Penn State Froth She—Oh, I don’t know. I sup- pose it is because I keep him up so late at night. —West Point Pointer re “Percy, boy, I’m worwid to death about something.” “What in the wowld are you worwid about, old chap?” “That’s the twob- ble, Percy—for the life of me I cawn’t wemem- ber.” —Virginia Reel The Old, Old Story Visitor to Detroit— I've ridden in your automobiles. Native—We make other things here be- sides automobiles. “Yes, I’ve ridden in them, too.” —Vanderbilt Masquerade Fae Hugh (outside phone booth)—What’s he try- ing to do, marry the girl by telephone? Carl—I_ guess so. He just gave her a ring. —NMiddlebury Blue Baboon Fae “Whatcha’ do last Saturday Night Life —Virginia Reel “Professor, tell me—do you believe in the transmigration of souls?” “To a certain extent, my dear young lady, but I would never recom- ment it as a regular practice.” —Brown Jug PID He—Why does that man always refer to you as his baby girl? hour?” “Took part in a guessing contest.” “But I thought you had an exam in math.” “T did.” —Brown Jug Fae “John, dear, I am to be in an amateur theatrical. What would folks say if I were to wear tights?” “They would probably say that I married you for your money.” —Dartmouth Jack o’ Lantern