Judge — July 19, 1924 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Champion—You keep yer trap closed or I'll give yuh a poke in the jaw! THE ROMANCE OF THE ANIMAL CRACKER (Reprinted from a pamphlet of the Rat-Um- Alive Animal Cracker Co.) Ne pousr the ave lover, when he buy e- animal er: a box of ni crackers, scarcely realizes what a romance of industry lies behind the production of these luscious, yet so nourishing, deli- l pursued the his- tory ker far back into the mists of time. In the tomb of ‘Tut ankh-amen were found the prototypes of the animal cracker of to-day: unleavened cookies hammered into the form of « Although beautiful taste is ned scholars | the animal ¢ bulls and dragons, in design and workmanship, the what gritty, in nowise to be com- I hnow and love. 1 to the melting smoothness we all Middle nimal cracker makir the were ud property of the rout the handed down from father to son, das the sverely con attitudes of the unicorn and the stiff, hard draperies of Adam point to the thraldom to con- vention of the artists of the time. But the with its redis- covery of classi Jil scholasticism, liquity, and its ion of the mind from mec Drought with it flowering of the art of the anime “Animula, vagula, blandula! of the great Humanists, referring, it ang one appears from minute re: eating elephant. models began to be used; it is related that Fra Gimmi da Bol " goat. in his bakery said to have Vanilla’s Ev (An int lent period may well be crackers made for Lucrezia Borg ei -s-sh! rarches, to an For the first time living ni for I for the great Jello », the first gingerbread nude. esting ancedote of this turbu- repetition. ‘The > Don’t make such a noise! 24 somal use were divided into two lots: plain and poisoned. “Have a hippopot- amus!” she would say winningly to a visiting archbishop, herself picking out a buffalo, For dello Vanilla had written on the morning's bill: “Buffalo bonissins hippopotamo no good!") With the rise of modern industrialism the art of the animal cracker has been olutionized, No longer are the crackers toby hand. |G -Um-Alive re clabo cary stamps in’ the marked “Camel, -wiggy. turn out the finished product at of over three and a half billion In addition to the facto sembly plants are maintained. in ferent sections of the United States, netor . umer- where the animals are assembled, two by two, into Ark: and Eve inserted. Visitors to the Eat-Um-Alive plants never fail to be impressed by the hig standards they find there so rigidly forced. As in Gothie cathedrals, those parts of the elephants one does not see are constructed with the same painstaking That bugbear of and a regulation Adan care as the exteriors. the animal-cracker amateur, broken tails, absolutely clusive semi-rigid full-floating tail con- struction, We use only the highest grade heat-tested triple-ply vanadium yeast. It is more expensive; it is usually only to be found in de luxe foreign hand wrought annot occur with our new ex- animal crackers; but our only purpose in business is to serve the public and give them the best, no matter what the cost. Can you afford to buy just ordinary animal crackers? Can you bear to hear that bitter ery of the kiddies: “Its an inferior animal cracker, Daddy! Tt isn’t an Eat-Um-Alive!” M. B “Look what I caught—a—pair o’ breeches!” You'll frighten away the suspenders!” ee comicbooks.com