Judge — March 1, 1924 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

the bone. Stanford Chaparral. Fae Faith—The young man who sends flowers to a girl who has broken a date on account of illness. Hope—The man who calls a girl for a date at eight o'clock Saturday evening. Charity—The girl who suggests they go to the movies.—Northwestern Purple Parrot. sae Professor—Can any person in this class tell me what steel wool is? Pie Bate—Sure! Steel wool is shearings from hydraulic rams— Stanford Chaparral. Dentist (extracting tooth)— This will be ten dollars. Victim — Keep the damn’ thing.—California Pelican. Grandpa—This cold air chills me to Tue Erernau Femini NE How I wish that some debater, Versed in all forensic laws, Would some happy day create a Safe rebuttal for “Because.” —Northwestern Purple Parrot. Soe Motorist—I'd like a dozen eggs, please. Farmer—I haven't a dozen; I got only ten. Motorist—Well, are they fresh? Farmer—They’re so fresh the hen Granddaughter—Put on your hat.— didn’t have time to finish the dozen. —Williams Purple Cow. Soph—I was over to see her last night, when some one threw a brick through the window and hit the poor girl in the ribs. Fresh—Did it hurt her? “No, but it broke three of my fin- gers.”—Pittsburgh Pitt Panther. St I Love Her She smokes, She paints, She powders. She reads La Vie Parisienne, She drinks my liquor, She stays out all night, She cusses, too, She eats lobsters at midnight, She does lots of things she ought not to, But she’s my grandma and I love her. —Witt. Rad Presumption is a wonderful thing . . . otherwise a man would have to ask for a kiss.—Texas Ranger. “My watch has gone wrong.” “The influence of environ- ment.’’ — South California Wampus. see Ain’t it tough, When you're out with The “only” girl, And you've told her How much you Love her For her beautiful face And pretty ways; And you've told her You'll give up All other girls, and You'll reform and be good For her sake; And then, When you've sealed it With a marvelous, Blissful, holy Kiss; And you take off Your frat pin, And you're putting it on Her dress; And then you stick yourself On some other guy’s Frat pin, Ain’t it tough? —New York Mercury. Bs t _ “My math. prof. has lost his job.” “No, really?” “Yep, he isn’t my math. prof. any more.’’ — Northwestern Purple Parrot. FEI A A For I'll That Another Along But I fe Broke But nov It’s fy About a That For girl: The t But the Must Th —N comicbooks.com