Judge — February 16, 1924 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Parson JOHNSON’S SERMON ON CHICKENS H’S DONE PUPARED dis hyar dis- cou’se speshulty fo all you chicken-stealin’ niggahs. Don't you tell me you all ain’ stole no chickens cause de onliest way dat a nigger won't steal chickens ez fo de niggah to be in jail, or else fo dar not to be nochickens. You know Jedge Harr- sin done ‘plained to me dat some- body done bin visitin his hen house. Fustly en fo'mostly dis am mos in- consistant. De Jedge done got a ten gauge shotgun en she’s loaded wid buckshot. Ah’m tellin’ you dis cause Ah don’ want de Lodge whut Ise loc’ly rep’sentin to hab to pay out no good money to bury any ob you wuthless niggahs. Nudder rea son am dat Ah don’t want Dr. Maw- gan to haf to pick no buckshot outen yo no-count hides, cyaze he’s gwine to chawge least two dollahs, en you sho do need dat money to pay de preacher. Folkses, does you all know da de niggah an de chicken done been soshated t’gethah evah since de fust niggah? Dis same t’ing splains why niggahs allus gwine to like chicken. Yas, suh! Listen clost en Ise gwine to tell you. You all knows dat de Good Book say dat Marse Ham, son ob Noah, wuz de Daddy ob all de niggahs. Did you all eber hyar ob “ham en eggs"? Ah don’t ax you did you, but how much? Ham en eggs am de mostest com’nest ‘spre- shun dar ez. Evah since dar’s been ham dar’s been eggs. All de niggahs come from ham an all de chickens come from eggs. Dat’s de reason why niggahs am allers gwine to like chicken, Some ob you niggahs whut don’t wuk sho am good providahs en yo fambly don’t lack nuthin’ but it sho am geittn’ dange’us. Its clost to lec- tion time en de sheriff am runnin’ fo annudder term. Ver'ly, ver'ly, Ah say unto you, ef you all gwine to steal be sho an don’t git caught. Fo we takes de c'lection Ah wants to ‘press it on yo alls min’s dat dis preacher sho do like chicken, an Ise gwine to ‘cept any invitashun Ah gits to dinnah. J. H. Green. Tuere Ary’t No Sic ANIMAL Zoblogy is not my But yet I know beyond debate A corset on a jellyfish Won't make a vertebrate. S.C. WeaTtHeErty. Mr. Mouse—Awfully nice, my dear, of friend spider to permit us to hook-up to his aerial! he es! ha of su He of 4 i G PROGRESS ON THE STYX Charon—Taxi? comicbooks.com