Judge, 1924-01-26 · page 11 of 37
Judge — January 26, 1924 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Explanation for Modern Readers This Judge magazine page contains three distinct pieces of early 20th-century American humor: **"How Mothers Put in Their Days"** satirizes maternal exhaustion through exaggerated time accounting—mothers spend 23 hours saying "Willie, don't do that!" to misbehaving sons. The joke mocks both child-rearing tedium and the emerging "scientific" breakdown of daily activities. **"Cruelty to Animals"** is a romantic poem where a suitor repeatedly sends exotic birds (canary, parrot, pheasant, polar bear cub) to win over a cold woman named Mary. Each animal dies from her indifference—until a polar bear cub melts her heart, only to die from the sudden warmth. It's absurdist satire on romantic gestures and emotional inconsistency. **"Komics for the Kiddies"** shows children misbehaving (gluing chairs, kicking each other) with adults helplessly responding. The final panel's "LEFT EYE!!" punchline relies on slapstick violence as humor—reflecting period attitudes toward child discipline that modern readers would find disturbing. The sketchy illustrations and newspaper-style comedy reflect Judge's mid-century American satire aesthetic.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
How Mothers Put in Their Days “Willie, Resting from s: don’t do that!” ‘ Deciding whether or not to say, Saying, don’t do that!” i Villie, 3 hours 2 hours “Willie, don’t do that!” 4 hours Demanding that Willie’s father ay, “Willie, don’t do that 1 hour about Willie to her” 2 hours Grand total (as it seems to her).23 hours —John Matter. Rd Mother—You must play gently with your little brother. Bobbie—Don't you want him to grow up to be a man? Medicaments T= prucaist in Los Angeles Gets rich quick, it appe By selling rouge for dimpled k And glycerine for tears. —Wnm. S. Adkins. S “Do you think she will land _on her skis?” “No, I don’t think will.” she KOMICS FOR (In the approved newspaper style) Cruelty to Animals To sane the passing of a tiff To show I wasn't proud and stiff, Tsent my Mary ‘ A yellow canary: But Mary blew frost on cage of gold— Canary contrarily died of cold. I sent my Mary a dulcet parrot One retrieved from the fruity garret Of jungle’s tangled banyan tree That he might echo my misery: But still the atmosphere was frigid, And sadly soon the bird was rigid. T sent my Mary a golden pheasant From China—thinking ‘twould be pleasant By tropic sign to indicate My sentiments affectionate: But Mary gave him the icy eye What could a pheasant do but die? Then in despair, tearing my hair, A tiny bit of a polar bear Tsent my Ma ‘The whimsey warming her frosty heart— Forgot to play her Arctic part; ‘Took little whitie and hugged him tight, Beamed on him with tropical light; Merrily phoned me, meltingly sw While cub contrarily died of the | —Cyril B. THE KIDDIES WHO PUT GLUE ON THE SEAT OF THIS CHAIR, HUH? ae — WHATCHA (GONNA DO ABOUT IT? p< £9) ees KICK HIM IN THE ENE, 5 ERIC — KICK HIM IN THE EYE! ( You LITTLE RASCAL— IMEANT THE LEFT EYE!! comicbooks.com