Judge, 1923-12-15 · page 14 of 36
Judge — December 15, 1923 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical piece mocks the discomfort of public telephone booths—then ubiquitous in American life—by proposing absurdly elaborate "improvements." The author complains that booths are cramped, forcing users to empty their pockets to close the door. His tongue-in-cheek solutions escalate from reasonable (make booths bigger) to ridiculous: furnish them with rockers and Morris chairs, stock them with cigars and lemon soda, install Automat-style food dispensers, and print entertaining fiction in phone directories to amuse waiting callers. The accompanying comic strip illustrates increasingly desperate scenarios of people struggling in phone booths—standing awkwardly, contorting themselves, appearing flustered or embarrassed. The satire reflects early-to-mid 20th-century American life when public telephones were essential infrastructure. The joke's appeal lay in readers' shared frustration with genuinely cramped, uncomfortable booths. The humor punches at ordinary civic inconvenience rather than political targets, making this light social commentary rather than sharp satire.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Larger and Better Booths, Et Cetera (A Few Phoney Suggestions) by Robert Cyril O'Brien [suet as the average citizen spends so much of his time in telephone booths, I think something or other should be done to make the darn things more comfortable. There isn’t enough room inside of a tele- phone booth. Personally, I have to empty my pockets every time [have oc casion to use a booth—if I don't I close the door. And I don’t like to leave the door open because my language is not any too choice when I become excited. Of course, if the telephones were re- moved, there would be more space—but that’s silly. The only solution seems to be to build the booths slightly larger say seven or eight times the size they are now 's, that’s it—larger booths. ’ they could be furnished appropri and made comfortable. Now (or later, if you prefer), in regard to the furnishings. I think a rocker or a morris-chair would be a great improve- ment over the little tricky seat usually found (after a search) in most booths to-day. Then there should be an ash tray and a box of cigars and a case of lemon soda or something in. proximity. That would help a man to forget the long wait. Also, a man is more apt to overlook a wrong number or two when he is full of lemon soda or something, isn’t he? Vote yes. Good use could be made of the remain- ing space by the installation of an a ment similar to the one now in favor at the Automat. Then a person could save lots of time by eating and phoning simul- taneously. While I am on the subject, I might as well say that there seems to be room for improvement in the directories. W for instance, wouldn't it be. pr to stimulate interest among the What is sauce for the gander pretty telephone girl covers by the leading artists? The public would eagerly issues if good, red-blooded fiction, funny stories, jokes and comic pictures were sandwiched between names and numbers of subscribers, Just think of the business A. Cohen, f'rr'r, 125 B'way, BOWL Grn 711, would get if his name. for instance, followed the joke about the Irishman who peruse the 12 had to shoot the rabbit before he loaded his gun because the rabbit wouldn't wait The telephones themselves could be greatly improved. What could be sweeter than an attachment that would auto- matically clectrocute everyone who spoke indistinctly? Or something that. would enable a person to buzz back in the opera tor’s ry And another arrangement whereby a person who had deposited a nick fact abi or s I mor the ay mig mig for. vers of t of opp get coul F muc was expl The ema comicbooks.com