Judge, 1923-12-01 · page 4 of 36
Judge — December 1, 1923 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Explanation of Page Content This page features an illustration by Gilbert Wilkinson depicting two figures in a bedroom scene—a woman reading aloud from a letter while a man lies in bed. The accompanying dialogue jokes that the letter's recipient is "priceless for insomnia," suggesting tediously boring correspondence. Below this is an article by Chet Shafer titled "Bigger and Better Athletics," proposing humorous new athletic events for a 1924 national field day. The suggestions are absurdist parodies of legitimate sports—replacing standard competitions with ridiculous activities like "tooth gnashing," "wiggling ears," and "broad yawn, after dinner listeners." The satire mocks both the era's athletic enthusiasm and the growing commercialization of amateur sports by suggesting increasingly absurd "competitions."
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Drawn by GILBERT WILKINSON, aN |} Sentimental Girl (having read lengthy letter aloud)—With it all, I suppose he’s really like the rest, good for nothing? Bored Listener—My dear, he’s price- less for insomnia! BIGGER AND BETTER ATHLETICS UTSIDE of the opportunity to estab- lish yurse record for lost balls the avi ¢ hookoo has little or no chance to distinguish himself in the fields of modern athletic endeavor. events offer no broad appe: . open to participation only by those who are especially trained and invited. And the situation is deplorable. ‘The restric- tions are to be lamented. For, if given an opportunity to compete in an event with which he was familiar, man; un- sung layman could show a degree of class that would place his name on the rolls of athletic honor. In every city in this broad land there are countless thou- by Chet Shafer sands prepared to demonstrate their prowess if certain substitutions could be made in the programs of competition. Wit this thought, the following list of events is suggested for a national field day to be held early in 1924: Running broad slump, for stock brokers. Hurling the epithet, pedestrians. Wiggling ears, social climbers. One hundred yard crash, grade crossing victims. Poll vault, national committeemen. Putting 16 ounce blot, bookkeepers. Fifty yard dash, subway patrons. Broad yawn, after dinner listeners. Tooth gnashing, whe: Aqui vents, milkme Guessing contests, ph : Throwing the fifty-six pound plate, fathers. Putting up one-man top, autoists. Mile walk, mailmen. Sigh heaving, flappers. Free-for-all-trot, shuttle tomers. Soldering, preachers. Wire tapping, banjo players. ‘The above program would unquestion- ably bring together some of the greatest talent. Brilliant performances would mark theday. Many fine records would be hung armers. train cus- up. rial; thet enou mod trad: ruc mor wel wer mai comicbooks.com