Judge — December 1, 1923 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ES le EY phia The Plumber to His Son (Using a Stillson Wrench on Kipling) by Edmund J. Kiefer r you can make a job of small begin- nings And think up many items for the bill, Forget your tools and cover it’ with grinnings And have a young apprentice who stands still; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To make-believe when all the work 1s done And so fool on—no other reason in you | Except the plumber’s impulse to fool on— If you can walk to work and never hurry And then return and still not rush too | much, If neither kicks nor criticism cause you | worry, If all men learn to fear your gentle “touch”: If you ean bill the unforgiving minute For sixty-seconds’ worth of “labor done,” Yours is the world and everything there’s in it, And—which is best—you'll be a] plumber, son! sas Emulate the Hammer by Thomas W. Griffith T= HAMMER is a knocker, but it is a constructive one. Its knocking sel- dom injures anyone. Its work is a continuous drive; yet it never solicits subscriptions. It sometimes possesses pull, but it does not depend on that entirely for its results. Frequently it gets down to brass tacks. When it sees an opportunity, it usually nails it. It goes right to the point. It strikes home. Emulate the hammer! Results “The girl is very kittenish and the son is just a pup!” ji you see their parents always led a cat-and-dog life!” Giving the Telephone Life ‘Wherever your thought goes your voice may go. You can talk across the continent as if face to face. Your telephone is the latch to open for you any door in the land. There is the web of wires. The many switch- boards. The maze of apparatus. The millions of telephones. All are parts of a country-wide mechanism for far-speaking. The equipment has cost over 2 billion dollars, but more than equipment is needed. There must be the guardians of the wires to keep them vital with speech-carrying electrical currents. There must be those who watch the myriads of tiny switchboard lights and answer your commands. There must be technicians of every sort to construct, repair and operate. A quarter of a million men and women are united to give nation-wide telephone service. With their brains and hands they make the Bell System live. “BELL SYSTEM” AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY “And I suppose you want to be President when you're grown up?” “Naw, I'd rather be right on the green than be President.” AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES One Policy, One System, Universal Service and all directed toward Better Service “Deliver me, darling.” said one sophis- ticated woman to another, rom the man who doesn’t understand women! ‘They're simply impossible to slip anything over on. sae “Isn't that boy Clubleigh?” “Yes, but I'm waiting to see if any- one else answers it.” sae paging you, Mrs. “Oh, look at the car dad gave me for ‘hristinas!” ! What power “Oh, about forty reindeer!” 23 Mr. Simp—We have a great deal to be thankful for. Mrs. Simp—Indeed we have. I'm real glad that my friends haven't got the things we can’t afford, cither. woo Little man in a rowboat with large a dominant wife. She says to him: t up off that seat! Don’t thwart me! Per “T have to pay one dollar a day gar: ge for her r y gosh! ‘ cylinder heads off!” chi and she