Judge — November 10, 1923 — page 31: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Famous Last Words—There the whistle — watch me get ahead of the train. sae Ballade of Literary Folk by Herbert S. Talbot I reap the lines of FL PLA, Gadzooks, he is a skilful wight, (As Uncle Walt would aptly say) \t turning verses neat and light. H. Mencken knows his stuff all right, He tre s foes like a front-door mat. I too have foes Pd like to smite, If only 1 could write like that. goes across | The drama stuff of Ge Is criticism at its height. “The height of what?” you ask—but nay, What matter?—so he’s never trite. J. Cabell T would fain invite In the Hall of Fame to park his hat. raloft in fancy flight, T could write like that. orgie J. ng rich del Hight. les the hours away When I can’t fall asleep at night. Van Vechten’s talent is not slight: A. Machen’s reputation’s pat. © Lord, the volumes Pd indite, If only I could write like that! UVEnvoi I've never read Sir H. B. W They say he’s coined a million flat. Tl risk the critics’ souls to blight If only I could write like that. PIS Crauford—Of all the things you learned in college what have you found to be the most use in after lif. Crabshaw—Well, thanks to my knowl: edge of football, IT manage to hold my own in the subway rush. ka “Doctor, T can’t slee ake this medicine “But, doctor, I'll never be able to wake up for that.” ight... . strictly every tae Mr. Gayboy—T'll not be home to dinner this evening. Important business, you know. Wife—Say, I don’t object to your giv- ing your stenographer a treat once in a while, but I'd rather you wouldn't ma business of it. aad sighed Galahad Pym, the “This a workaday “Ah, hired world.” “You said it.” responded Smith, the grizzled farmer. day and take two days off.” me,” man. is Lancelot “Work a “How I Became Popular Overnighi!’ “They used to avoid me when I asked foradance. Some said they were tired, others had previous engagements. Even the poorest dancers preferred to sit against the wall rather than dance with me. But I didn’t ‘wake up’ until a partner left me standing alone in the middle of the floor. “That night T went home fecling pretty Lonesome 1 mighty blue. As a ial failure. At first Tw could teach by mail b * disappol My ‘Aud T owe ltall to Arth ‘as astonished to see how quickly one HN of Uh ms and. siinp through the ye of Wt music or partner,” Learn Any Dance in a Few Hours Whether Fr fre duneing at home with want to learn the Foxtrot, One Step, th t : uthority. on method of the sate je Tessons Lit his studlo and his regular fee of $10 per lesson Five Dancing Lessons Free is Arthur Murray thit you will be delighted hods of teaching that Ime only. to and return ald ” Posed by Miss An and Arthur Murr Write for the five i ns today—they are enclose Ie (stamps or Coin) to. pay. Cost ns Will be prompts malted Th a fully. Write today ARTHUR MURRAY Studio 934 290 Broadway New York Arthur Murray, Studio 934 290 Broadway, New York City Name Aditress Higgs—Another big Klan mass mecting busted up again last night. Biggs—1 wonder if it’s that same Irish- man, FAH “AILT want is a square deal.” “L fear not. A’ square deal necessarily mean good cards.” doesn't Willie’s idea of a steeplechase. 29 A Song for Eyolutionists by Edwin Rutt NCE in the Miocene jungle, ages and O Life went along without bungle, fe the ice and the snow; You wore a daphne mantilla and I wore a from When you were a gay young gorilla, and Twas an anthropoid ape. Swinging from trees in the dawning: Dlissfully sleeping at noon: With acacia leay an awning; eyshines under the moon: We feasted on nuts and vanilla, and never knew sorrow or crape, When you were a gay young gorilla, and I was an anthropoid ape. monk- stot Vaudeville Manager—A mad wag breezed into my office to-day, Joe, and squawked that you're using, without his permission, some wheezes he originated, but L told him emphatically he was laboring under a delusion, Monologist—Thanks brief, but what made were right? “Why, the fellow wasn't twenty-five years old.” the you holding so sure for you more than