Judge — October 6, 1923 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Edwin Levick, Hudson River Golf Club, Yonkers, N. Y. Where many a poor fish is caught in a trap. TOLD AT THE 19th HOLE by Walter Trumbull NE marked difference between the O fine golfer and the dub is that the former is trying to score and the o lam the b was he can, In certain situations the expert may pur- posely play short, but the dub will always try to clear the trap or brook, no matter what distance he may be away. Where the expert may play a mashie and a brassie, the dub always will try to play the " habit ts him a lot of strokes, but he is repaid if once in ten times he carries some obstruction which he has no business trying to carry. There was a man in our town Who knew a thing or two; He kept his eve upon the ball And always followed through. + * * For thy swing, go to the crab, thou golfer, considering how it moveth back smoothly and along the ground. * * * The MahJongg playerhas method in going to the rough. He wants to pick his own flower. * * * Whether to-day your score be low or high, Whether your shots fly straight or go awry, Be sure, however you have played the game, You'll not improve it with an alibi. * * * There are so A golfer’s bed-time story is one about the good little left’ arm which always minded its teacher and kept straight. sot Some Expressions We Never Hear by E. N. Moody Nos can isn't very fast I everyone goes around me. These eggs aren't strictly fresh, but they look fresh: so they sell all right. My boy isn’t exceptional in any way: just an average youngster One fish got away; but it was a very small one. Probably I don’t get a very big salary, but I'm being paid all I'm worth. soe Almost The dirt farmer is not the only one who goes through Congress with unclean hands, GOLF AS A CURE FOR NERVOUSNESS Ballades of a Dub My Game Is Queered by My Scotch Hose by ALN. C. Fowler Te goats must be swear, The Scots have got the nerve to skin ‘Their woolen stockings to prepare To cover Yankee calf and shin; T coughed up quite a wad of tin To buy some of those stockings, those ‘shaven things—now I'm all in ame is queered by my Scotch hose. some tough, I They're one inch thick so if you care To make ‘em think your legs aren't thin Just work yourself into a pair And show yourself as Babe Ruth's twin; But, as for action, you won't win Because you're so darned adipose You're anchored ere you can begin My game is quecred by my Scotch hose And shaggy? Say, a polar bear Could rightly claim the closest kin To hose that 1 a barber's chair And just once over “cross the chin; In Scotland it may be a sin To wear much less in fogs and snows, But here give me less wool, more gin My game is queered by my Scotch hose. L'Envoi Please, silkworms, be prepared to spin Some cooler socks for my cramped toes, Or Lean never reach the pin My game is queered by my Scoteh hose. sat ages? Old Grouch—My observation has been that any marriage is a trial. Rata Hobo—I I'm not an ordinary bum. T used to have an automobile of me own. Lady—Then how did you come to be a beggar? “Buyin’ gas fer it, mum.” tote ITTLE RTRUDE had been reared according to scien- a | J tific: principles When she visited her cousins, she was shocked to learn that they all drank from one common cup Her objection to this method was met with the question, “What difference does it yi" she ex- plained, “you'll get microbes on you, and Tl get your crobes on me.” ttt many mistakes to choose from at golf that to make the same mistake twice shows t lack of imagination. He _ receives golf club for dinners, etc., $286— Treatment this week, $436. Total expense to date, $4,732. the first and numerous bills for and finds, after paying semi-annual bill from the golf these bills, lunches, shoes, golf gloves, etc.— overdrawn his checking account $67. stockings, grip all $150— u“ “Why do you sup- pose chiropractors are so successful?” “They help a lot of people find their backbone.” he has comicbooks.com