Judge — September 1, 1923 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A LADY TAKES A SWIM MING LESSON by Edward Anthony to swim, instructor, r youll never Tearn id the ing a-scared of the water, “I—I Mrs. T ain't a-scare Poogelheim, co! replied puffy lungful L used n, Mrs. Poogel- and you ain't Tt won't do.” is is the ninth les uid the instructe Ss yet. rry, Mr. Burke,” continued vive pupil, “FL take out another ten-lesson care Tl learn to swim a month later, f I could live to forty without knowing how to swim, another month won't mz no difference.” “It does make a difference,” retorted Mr. Burke with a touch of asperity, you can’t swim the width of the tank ain't much k considering the tank is only four- on fect wide—L get rats from the boss. ‘ow is your tenth lesson and then you the once ove . Mr. Burke, Mrs. Poogelheim, “lll try hard to ph you this afternoon and maybe PH | enough to pass the examination. And n’L pass it, well, you know how it You couldn't hardly expect: me to » in and drown myself.” “Tt wouldn't do me any good if you did.” replied the instructor, “I'd still have to explain why I didn’t teach you to swim. “Well, come on and teach me, Mrs. Pos “Pm willin, “All said the worried Mr. Burke, “‘let’s try the side stroke over again. Let go of the rail, 1 ig M's: PooceLnem’s gaicty left her. 4 As Jong as she could feel that re- assuring rail in her hand she managed to maintain a cheerful exterior. Once she felt it slip from her clutch, her con- fidence left. her. Wrinkles corrugated her brow as she looked up apy at her relentless *taskmaster. ten lessons—and_ that laughed heim. Sketches by Weed “Well, are you going to stand there all day? shou t go of itl? Mrs. Poogelheim le ‘Over on your next. command. ‘The again looked up in mute app “Over on your side, [ said! Mr. Burke. “What do you th doing?—posing or something? “Mr. B-B-Burke, the water is c-c-cold,” pleaded Mrs. Poogelheim. “It's warm enough when you're hold- ing the rail,’ Mr. Burke shot “but when Task you to do something it suddenly gets cold. Over on your side!” pupil repeated ak you're too back, IR Burke—Mr. Burke—I'm will you please—I wish, Mr. worried Burk “What's the matter now, Mrs. heim? A lobs' youssee"a'shas . “Mr. Burke, please, Mr. Burke, help get over on my side. I don't know how to do it yet without going under When I go under I get diz: Or do nip your toc and my How the phrase “bathing beauties” originated. “Let go the rail! Remember the Leviathan!” head swims.” What Mr. Burke thought “Well, let your darned 1 It's the only part of you tl knows how.” But he didn’t quite dare. He stood on the edge of the pool and surveyed this woman, She — annoyed him. He would have enjoyed fracturing her skull with one of the Indian clubs in the gymnasium upstairs. Still, he was there to teach her to swim. Phil- osophically, he decided to step into the water and help this she-whale get over Then it occurred to him as he had to do it, he might t her a little. Why step nit was possible to dive splash that would sub- udy and “make her head idea appealed to him. Into the water he dove. his usual graceful dive: he saw to that. Instead, landing in a floppy heap, he sent gallons of water flying in al A piano falling into the pool from a fifth story window swit on her side. that as long as well te into the p and make merge the swim’? The . Kerflop! It wasn't ections. couldn't have made a greater splash. (Continued on page 30) comicbooks.com