Judge, 1923-08-25 · page 8 of 36
Judge — August 25, 1923 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Ballades of a Dub" - Judge Magazine Satire This page satirizes golf cheating and dishonesty through multiple sketches. The main ballad mocks a golfer named Smith who scores an eight but claims a six—a common form of golf fraud. The poem's repeated refrain "He got an eight and called it six" emphasizes how petty dishonesty pervades social circles, from golf courses to politics (referenced in verse one). The secondary cartoons extend the theme: a farmer's expert friend suggests substituting sawdust for expensive corn meal, resulting in hens with wooden legs—mocking false economy advice. Another sketch shows a woman ("the flapper") aggressively defending her rights, while the frog joke plays on misheard origins. The unifying message: American society is riddled with liars and cheaters—from golf partners fudging scores to con artists peddling bad advice. The satire targets masculine dishonesty, social pretense, and the difficulty of trusting anyone's word.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Ballades of a Dub He Got an Eight and Called It Six by A. N.C. Fowler 'o-pay TI played the short eighteen With Smith, a quite elusive guy— You know the brand of bird I mean Who'd just as soon forget as lie solitaire or try s some pull in polities— .at the third, [hope to die, He got an eight and called it six. Calm was his manner and serene As any cloudless, Maytime sky When, as we holed out on the green, He fixed me with a fishy eve And overlooked two strokes, while I Dumfounded at his bag of tricks, Was too astonished to deny— He got an eight and called it six With such a system in my bean I know that it would be a pie Around our course just to caren And make a fifty look too But what does such an alibi Get anybody? Gk Nis! Smith will play solus by and by— He got an eight and called it six. LEnvoi Recording angel, you must sigh Whenever golfing mortals fix Their scores to fit their modesty— He got an eight and called it si ery Ned—The flapper intends to fight for “Why do you think it was Willie who broke the window?” her rights. “When he went to bed he said his prayers without my having to remind Ned—I notice she him.” has her sleeves up and carries a stick in A PARNER was feeding his hens with hi +42 corn meal one ¢ when one of “The sawdust feed is working fine,” his boarders, an ef ‘y expert in the the farmer wrote back. “My old y city, who was watching him, exclaimed: low hen has been on it ever since “Why waste all that good corn meal you left and in her last on those hens? The stuff looks just hatching six of the like sawdust. Substitute sawdust for chicks had wooden it. The hens won't know the difference.” legs, three were wood- A few months later, the expert wrote and the rest from the city to the farmer to find out were woodpeckers.” w the sawdust feed was working. her mitt. “Oh, Professor, I’m so glad to hear you're an authority on sunspots! What would you advise—cold cream or lemon juice?” “Where did you learn to sing, Mister Frog?” “Down in the brook near the old sawmill.” “Hm-m! I might have known it!” comicbooks.com