Judge — February 24, 1923 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

fl f ; Old Things Are Best by Walt Mason Lp SHOES are best; I have a pair, defiant of all styles, in which I've journeyed here and there perhaps ten thousand miles. In such old scows one gallivants in comfort, fro and to; alas, my seven maiden aunts denounce each time-worn shoe, I wear fine shoes upon the street, of strictly modern build; and with blue anguish and repeat my worn feet are filled. I hav rest, mayhap, and sit down with a smile, and take my feet upon my lap, and blow on them a while. At night, with wearied bones and thews, I to my home repair, and don those good old ancient shoes, the shoes I like to wear. But if I wore them on the street, my credit soon would smash; the men who sell me hay and meat would clamor for the cash. So I must sacrifice my feet, like many another man; to keep my credit good as wheat I must be spick and span. (1 nOoKS are Dest: when tired and sad, I like an old-time tale, wherein the villain, bold and bad, finds sin does not avail. A while he prospers, passing well, and laughs in virtue’s face, while yet the hero and the belle must suffer for a space. The hero and the lovely maid are buffeted by fate; they find it hard in gloom to wade, and keep their smiles on straight. But always as I read I know they'll win out in the end; the villain will « soaked in woe, and die without a friend. “It isn’t Art,” the crities say; but give me I y may go to Hackensack or Hoboke en. For I would like to hold belief that all things come out right, and that our little load of grief will perish in a night. But pessimists are writing books that yield) no smile or laugh, there victories are won by crooks, and good men get the gaff. » PIES were best; the bygone dame le pies that pleased the just a widespread fame for n gorgeous crust. Once pies were m loving hands now gone beyond our ken: the old-time wife triumphant stands in Abner Turtle—You've a lot to be thankful for. You can eat and expand and eat some more; but I'm limited. I can eat just so much, then I’ve got to quit. tae memories of men. She took the pumpkin from the vine, the lard from out a crock, and made a pie so smooth and fine no epicure could m Now we go shop- ping for our pies along the Great White Way, and they are made by sordid guys who strike for higher pay. In concrete mixers. pies hour, and union workmen learn the trade, and shovel sand and flour. Sometim« we feel our hunger wax, and when w a pie, we break the cover with an ax, and then sit down and cry. oO poPE was best; when T was ill the village doctor came, and handed me ww, all you need is rest,” he'd say, while ‘making out his bill; “just. loaf around the house all day, and take, each hour, a pill. Exertion, while you're shut in sick, you strictly must avoid, and you'll get well so ge-blamed quick you will be overjoyed.” The modern doctor comes along when T am ill, and. cries, “Your course of life is wildly wrong—you need more exercise. Go out and saw nine cords of wood, or cultivate two farms; if then you are not feeling good, I'll saw off both your arms. I don't Wien in pea-green pills, of which, you say, you're fond; go, chase yourself around the hills, and swim across a pond.” se Net ly was rather condes- Lag, cending. Ti] My husband is \ her 8 partner on the | floor, “so I only ‘ dance with — ex- ceedingly people “It's a good system,” said he. “IT follow it.” Rad plain Sambo —Is yo’ gotany mo’ 0’ de warm blankets yo" heen advertise? Merchant This way “How long yo" “antee “em does gua Mr. Newlywed—Say, dear, are you using a lipstick with to stay warm, a new flavor or have you been eating onions? boss?” are made, a million pies an /s dark green pill that jolted all my frame. | Would You Giv $1 for 16 Dancing Lessons If — ancer made you nd. if you Iped develop illing to pay ‘om America’s ; perfected a won- which you tep from an- now some of s method and quickly 1 ner and without 1 —or the lessons an 90,000 have lea Proof You Can Learn at Home in One Evening Do You Know The Correct Dancing Position Mistakes The Art of Making Your Feet Look Attractive The Correct Walk in the Fox Trot The Basic Principles in Waltzing \ How to Waltz Backward oF a limited The Secret of Lead 5 16 Introduc ly $1.00. and mail a letter $1.00 ent and the will be The Chasse in the The Forward Waltz Step Leave One Partner to rot you. course for 5 if within 5 Should Know How to Develop Your Sense of Rhythm Etiquette of the Ballroom ibe ag ARTHUR MURRAY, Studio 655,801 Madison Ave., NewYork ARTHUR MURRAY, Stu To prove that you b 4 dec t T'may do so, and you will refund romptly and without question. | Name. Address. . JevtartenmeaveaeereeTe IN. ‘ City State (Price outside U.S. $1.10)