Judge — January 27, 1923 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

With the College Wits Irrepressible, Joyous, Irresponsible The Sheik off His Home Grounds Zour methods we admire, Sheik, We can't help praising your tech- nique, But yet, of you, A thing or two We can’t quite understand. How could you breathe on cheek Here, where policing’s not so weak? Your passion you could hardly wreak Without the desert sand; My boy, your efforts would prove meek In our commercial land. maiden’s For in this queer old country, Sheik, A girl is really quite a freak, And when you kissed She would insist That you had merely “necked”; But should you say that more you 1 seek I fear she'd “paste” you on the beak, Police would answer to her shriek— "Twould spoil the whole effect! You'd be in jail within a week With your ambitions wrecked. —Brown Jug. Clerk: (to i ment. store one-piece bathing suit? Tnebriate—S'mother time; my Y just over at the ribbon counter.—Le- high Burr. sbriate waiting in a depart- ‘ould T interest you in a There was a young maiden named Flo, Whom a fellow took out to a show; He thought she was fast, Now his flag’s at half-mast, For sitting behind was—her beau! —Toronto Goblin. “Ts this a second-hand store?” “Yessum. Il, I want one . for my wateh.”"— Virginia Reel. Judge's College Wits Number Judge’s Annual College Wits number will be published early in May next. Contributions to this number are already coming in. It should be understood that the work of undergraduates only is legitimate for this number, and that all contributions must be original and exclusively for Judge. Jokes, poems, little essays, all with the wit and humor that char- acterize the College Comics them- selves, are desired. The issue will have amusing illustrations of the kind that have made previous College Wits Numbers of Judge highly enjoyable. There will be room for one or two short, humor- ous stories; and the cover, in colors, should be a wonder. All contributions for this number will be paid for, and March Ist is the limit of time for their receipt. Address, College Wits Editor, Judge, 627 West 43d Street, New York. Dick—Bob and his dame are ignition difficulties, I see. Doek—What do you ni “Sparking trouble.” goyle. » having Michigan Gar- sae WwW" should T roam afar to see The beauties of the East? To view the Circes of New York, ved at Fashion's feast? let them come to me; Most beautiful—and least. I'm independent, popular,— I say so to be just: And though I’m modest, just as well, You too admit it must. yhy, man, to see me, I am sure “I travel far through dust. T've made a date to see them all— All those most known to Fame; re so many, I don’t know i name. I bid all beauties welcome—I Take tickets at The Game. —Yale Record. sae Fond Mater—Are your manners good? How do you eat your meals? Flippant Frosh—One at a_ time.— Northwestern Purple Parrot. 22 A Wedding Belle KISSED her in the moonlight, I kissed her in the dark, I kissed her in the parlor, I kissed her in the park— I fooled the other fellow, I left him in the lurch— I kissed her almost every where— He kissed her in the church. —Columbia Jester. Rad Nk of the most blissful occurrences in », as we would imagine it, is to yung thing to a Prom and vr say, “Oh, Tommy, I just adore your pin and all it means to me,” and then to look at it in your cestasy and to sud- that the pin she is wearing » opening a bottle -if you can get one, the rest —Denison Flamingo. sae “Poor Mildred’s husband died from poisoning.” “Well, Mildred course wasn't of valuc ae He—What do you say to a tramp in the park? She—I never speak to them.—Carneyie Puppet. ‘t say her chem Boston Bean pot. aa8 It doesn’t pay to be crooked—look at the corkserews out of a job—Chicago Phoeniz. Ye studes idea of a French curve. —Penn State Froth.