Judge — December 30, 1922 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

I and the girl of his heart, while country walk, had just en- countered a_feroci king bull and had retreated behind a high gate. “But I thought, dear,” ventured the maiden, “that vou always said you'd face death sured her, —The Royal So I would,” the swai “but that bull is not dead. Magaz ery yen one good re- we sternly de- “Can you mention ¢ sult produced by jazz? manded. “Certainly!” replied Uncle Fi Lt, renders professional musicians so furious that temporarily at least they forget to strut and pose and tell how good they are. —Kansas City Star, tae “Why did you compel that card sharp to sit in our friendly little game?” asked Cactus Joe. “Fur the common welfare,” replied Three-finger Sam. knows we all have him placed as a card sharp, and that we are rough when riled. If he has ordinary judgment he'll lose in self- defense.” —Washington Star. sae “T didn’t really mean that you are a beast,” said the prima donna, when the row was ¢ “You must allow- ances for my artistic temperament. “T do,” ‘said her manager bitterly, “but if there were any justice in this world I'd make deductions for it."— Birmingham Age-Herald. “We shall have peace now that our boy has returned to school!” “Yes. All that is wanted to com- plete my happiness is for you to enter a convent.” — Le Journal Amusant (Paris). Digest of the World’s Humor INE-YEAR-OLD MARIAN is her s pet. And whenever ful young business self any luxury she buys one for Marian, too. For instance, when she bought an umbrella for herself she bought Marian a parasol. She bought a bicycle to journey to work and Marian a 1 she bought a big roc nd Marian a little one. And the other evening she came home with a new beau, who was one of those nice, little fellows whom nature has made of the diminutive order. For a minute Marian eyed him and then she asked, “All right, auntie, I like hi But where's yours?”—Indianapolis News. Raed E WAS in his first week at college, and when he went to the sta c's to buy a fountain pen he felt desirous iol that the young woman who waited on District Visitor (calling on Mrs. Harris, him should know that in spite of his a new arrival in the village)—You seem youth he was no high school boy. When to have a great many children, Mrs. she handed him a sheet of paper he wrote Harr Harris—Yes, mum; and what's heir names begins with haitch. bert, my oldest. y flourishes, in a lary Mater, Alma Mate on it, with m bold hand, “Al eight or nine times. The clerk watched him with a simper, and at last she sp “Why don’t let her try it herself,” she suggested then if it doesn’t suit, of course, we'll change it.” —Milwaukee Sentinel. *Arold and *! They're all I and we christened "er Titbits. ah Holive.—London sae fan,” said the woman sternly, “will wake up one morning and find that the world is being ruled by women.” “Um,” sneered her husband. “Just like a woman, that.” » a woman?” she de- he answered, deliberately, “to age of a man when he sleeps.” —Rochester Democrat and Chronicle. tae F “This is the Red Tape Bureau. We “Halt or I fire!” . h 200 employees.” —Meggendortfer Blaetter (Munich). — “J did not suppose you had work for so cd , » we have an excellent system by which two men can do the work —Louisville Courier-Journal. ad Now put up a bold front on the golf of one. “There's a lot of people out who don’t know anything about the game.”—Kan- sas City Journal. “T see that bobbed hair is no longer fashionable. “Tt isn't, eh? It’s got to stay fashion- able until a million or more of us get a chance to grow hair sgain.”—Detroit Free Press. Flinty—It’s a shame, Bill, to think that anyone would swindle a poor, ‘ard-work- ing man in that way Stubble—Why, what’s wrong wi’ yer now? “Wron, Why, ’ere I worked ‘ard | fer ‘alf painting up a sparrer inter a Belgian canary, and I’m | feller I sold it to didn’t gi ‘alf-crown fer it!’—Pearson’s (London). Ohana “You see that stout old chap in the J ked Jones. What about him?” replied a wonderful acrobat.” He looks like a stock broker.” “But I thought you said he was an shat? “He’s both. I asked him yesterday whether he was busy and he ‘My boy, I just hang on from day to d keeping my nose above water by the skin of my teeth.’ "—Los Angeles Times. 24 “Little Max has swallowed a silver mark. I have sent Anna to the doctor with him.” “Is the person honest?”—Simplicis- simus (Munich).