Judge, 1922-12-09 · page 8 of 36
Judge — December 9, 1922 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Told at the 19th Hole": A Golf Wager Gone Wrong This page from *Judge* presents two interconnected golf stories from country clubs in the Pacific Northwest, told in verse and prose. The main narrative concerns **Bert Farrar**, president of the Seattle Golf Club, who visits San Diego and encounters a local fruit grower named **George Mason**. They wager on a golf match, with Mason betting **"a ton of lemons"**—a jest about San Diego's citrus industry. The humor operates on multiple levels: first, as a regional rivalry joke (Seattle's Northerner vs. San Diego's Southerner), and second, as a practical joke when Mason actually delivers the wager after losing. The satire mocks both the competitive boasting of wealthy golf club members and the comic literalism of taking humorous bets seriously. The accompanying verse mocks golf "dubs" (poor players) who boast absurdly about rare achievements like scoring four under par on a hole. The setting—an exclusive country club—positions this as humor for an upper-class audience familiar with golf culture and regional business rivalries.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘Told at the Mid-Pines Country Club, Knollwood, Pinehurst, N.C. Ballades of a Dub by A. N.C. Powter Great Scott! I Made the Fourth in One! ALL ont the band and roses strew Bind laurel round my fevered b We'll drink far more than mere home- Or seltzer with a dash of con Who says I'm not a golfer now? The Southerners and the Northerners— rivals in busin: commerce, industry and climat their best when putting something over on one another's golfers. Bert Farrar was president of the Seattle Golf Club when he became the victim of this lemon handing incident. He was visiting at San Diego and he wandered re rew Few do the deed that I have done : So to the champion « bow to the municipal links, He met a man I Great Scott! I made the Fourth in One! Mason, fruit grower. The | 2 \saero) | Bring on your medals, let me view ‘The prizes with which you endow The chap who has a thing to do, And goes and does it anyhow. If I seem chesty you'll allow That shot I played had quite a run, To finish as the cat's meow Great Scott! I made the Fourth.in One! 1 With many an overh: > yardage is one sixty-two, ing bough | ‘That will not do a thing to you Unless your ball flies straight cnow To sidestep trouble, I ave Yet I'm the lad who the row— » Fourth in One! I made t LEnroi Humility, please hear my vow And make me Mother Meckn Although I'd rather shout out: “ Great Scott! Imade the Fourth in One!” te : Ilanded a Ton of Lemons! HE South Pacific Coast has never ceased to chuckle over the incident for which the North Pacific Coast furnished the victim. } And other difficulties shun— Great Scott! “Say, Ed, d’'ya remember how the fields over in France used to get all torn up?” 6 *a hasty calculation on lemons that w native suggested a round of golf. The Seattle man won 2 and 1, playing even. The following day the met the Northerner in shop and st 1 another match, suggestion was accepted. “Let's make it ‘for something’ to-day,” said Mason. “Name it “A ton of ‘arrar. ainst a golf ball,” * retorted 1 Seattlcite when he regained his breath, after having made costing thirty cents a dozen on the home | market. irely,”” retorted Mason licating a citrus grove adjoin- Diego municipal links. and the fruit is ripe.” They went about their golf. “We were all square on th the Seattle ing the of the match. trapped on this iron-shotter and I was neatly on. grove the ightcenth However, he got out nicely and left me ay for the like. I short. He missed, leaving me a seven-footer for awin. And, believe me, [never thought so hard on any putt in my life. But, she rattled in the box—and the ton of lemons was mine. ‘Are you certain that you were not joking about that ton of Jemon: asked him. “Never more serious about anything in my life,” he replied. “Go on and collect 3 bet.” Over at the Mason grove two youths were hired at $1 each to pick from the trees one ton of lemons and to dump them into boxes with a comichooks.com a