Judge — October 14, 1922 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HE failure of the “best | minds” to function brilliantly at Washington inclines one to the belief that: minds may be are by no means un mere “best” minds, there are doubtless on the brain. market “special” minds, “fancy” minds and “extra faney” minds; possibly even “can- dled minds. Li enough, “be minds is but a traction of “best cold storage” minds, a reasonable supposition. Pd The Senate recently passed 165 bills at the rate of one per minute. The Senate has plenty of speed but no control. A liquor raid in Sing Sing prison resulted in the discovery of a still. ‘The underworld is rooting hard and hoping that the Prohibition En- forcement Bureau will put the place out of business. Sal “Germany vs Miss Elsic Fuller, film: sta nas not learned to hold an audience in a state of excitement.” Miss Fuller is prob- ably too young to remember the summer of 1914. “Tt is a pretty good indication that the rnment ison the right trac of both sides are disp — The Attorney At last an ideal argument for the Congressman up for re-clection. The temperature was ninety- cight degrees when Vice-president Coolidge addressed the Minnesota State Fu me folks will be hard to convince that it’ wasn’t ninety-cight below. rs Jersey City policemen must smile at citizens, wrding to the Director of Public Safety. New York police do better than that by citizens. They laugh at them. Amy Lowell has been broadcasting nights, the air is going to crack under the strain. rnd One trouble with President Harding is that when he raises the Big Stick he lets it fall like a feather. And when he brandishes a feather he lets it fall like the Big Stick. tae HERE are so many Oranges in subur- ban New Jersey—Orange, East Orange, West Orange and South Orange— that people are petitioning for the right to chi town names. Why not change the name the swellest’ Orange to Grapefruit, N. J.2 ry Greece will bear testimony that the Sick Man of the East suffered from nothing more serious than a slight indis- position, ala The family of the ex-Kaiser opposes his projected marriage to the Princess After careful consideration of all the exhibits, we come to the con- clusion that a pair of well-filled silk stockings, naturally crossed at the knees, would serve as a por- trait of almost any stage, movie or concert celebrity “just returned from abroad” As We Were Saying by Arthur H. Folwell Nature Studies by W. E. Hill The Medical Review of Reviews advocates hair-nets for the tem- peramental young men who “jerk soda water” and who “swing their heads to toss back their Titian locks.” A better plan, we think, would be to put every soda clerk in a sealpackerchief of oiled paper, like the soda counter sandwiches and cake 20 Hermine. Holland may be relied upon to sce that Wilhelm doesn’t make a runaway match of it. rey A New York policeman” was charged with having taken a bribe of but fifty cents. It is these cheap men on the force that play havoc with its morale. sas HENRY Ford is dismissing any man in his employ whost breath ‘smells of liquor. The trouble with this ediet is that it will skip so many chronic drit Henry should dismiss from his service any man whose breath smells of chloroform, varnish, tur- pentine, creosote, or hair Not many drinks in these days “smell like liquor.” Phd Pennsylvania has a tea crop in tonic, If Senator Pepper hurri can get control of the plants and have a prohibitive. tariff on tea tacked on to the MceCumber- Fordney bill. If Wyomir why not Pennsylvania tea: wool, Pla The Department of Agriculture is striving to perfect a squirtless lemon. When it is perfected, we suggest that it be named after the Hon. Henry Cabot Lod os A fifty-cent piece is to be issued in commemoration of the birth of Rutherford B. Hayes. Old-time Tilden) Democrats will) move in amendment that it be a thirty-cent piece. ttt monkeys.—.1 start Next June’s “Hasty should have a corkin; tae TLANTIC CITY, having crowned its LX queen of beauty, it is time she was stood on end in the Hearst: news- papers and compared with the Wool- worth Building. . . . », we're mixed; they do that with ocean liners. Com- pared with the Venus de Milo, was what we meant. Pudding” show A hd Perhaps it would help some if monkey glands were grafted on the Republican clephant. paw When the truth comes out, it will doubtless be shown that Man Friday was Robinson Crusoe’s bootlegger. Rnd levelog The ne wood sawdust 1 dairy cattle food from soft Wise Don't Future warning: any wooden milk, eer WHILE, thes were “seeing New York,” Wall Street should have staged for the visiting bankers one of those snappy daylight hold-ups in which a ten-dollar-a-weck messenger is robbed of $500,000 worth of negotiable securities in a doorway. comicbooks.com