Judge — September 2, 1922 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A Young Woman Cx ISS. What they need most And what they’d better do In this or that position, Counsels, and criticizes freely When talking to themselves Or other friends. Heedless she sows her wisdom bre And fails to save a portion for herself Washington Cougar's Pau Rd Bellhop (after guest has rung for ten minutes) —Did you ring, sir? Guest—Hell, no! 1 tolling; I thought you were d!—Wesleyan Wasp. tts THERE was a your Who was marrie« blond; When her lawyer, with glee, Asked a large divorce She gave him a Liberty Bond. California Pelican. Rata she tells her friends least 0. ady named Pond nd twenty, and fee, She—How did you break your glasses, old dear? He—I sat down on them. She—Some acrobat.—Colorado Dodo. Pad “That mausoleum has been condemned by the building inspector.” “What's the matter with it?” “It hasn’t any fire escapes.” —Denison Flamingo. st When ice cream grows on macaroni trees, When Sahara’s sands are muddy: When cats and dogs wear B. V. D.’s That’s the time I like to study. —George Washington Ghost. st “No” at first; know how s.—Cornell A great many girls say but like the photographer, t to retouch their negativ Widow. see Landlady (knocking at. the bedroom door)—Eight o'clock! Eight o’clock! Frosh (sleepily)—Did you? Better call a doctor.—Lehigh Burr. BACK FIRE _“He stole a kiss from me last night.” “I guess you'll find him a pretty honest fellow.”—Cornell Widow. ‘With the College Wits Irrepressible, Joyous, Irresponsible ’s that Second from the right—What deserted old building over there Ditto left—Must be where to make hairpins.—Denison ttt they used Flamingo. °24—That’s a vampy litte chair you've got there. *25—Whadd. "24—Bare leg: much upholstery. mean? 2 low neck, and not Mass. Tech. Voo Dov. BE “How was the burlesque show?” “Rotten.” “As good as that?”—Boston Bean- a ‘To-day would be mobbed y eager spectators— You see, “twould be bobbed. —Princeton Tiger. Rr “Did you notice that girl who just ed?” The one with the bright blue sweater, stockings with roses about three inches apart, sport shoes, bobbed hair and— “Not particularly.” ~Grinnell Malteaser. as Figuring FI were thin If I were fat as Mary As Mary _ Smith Jones Td have such lovely I'd be so glad, curves I wouldn’t have a bone that showec Or thinly padded nerves. Td never need Cod Liver Oil And tonics by the yard. I'd keep quite warm, and if I fell I shouldn't: get much Hundred rolls At lunch And never Have to pause. I shouldn’t ever Need to walk Or exercise A jarred. Td laze T'd move with stately Around majesty. I'd never hop and jump! I'd smile around, and curve around, And still be sweet and plump. —Wellesley College News. And doze Around And still be ‘Thin and Tall. A Bedroom Farce (Short Sheets) I GOT in bed The other night And pulled the covers Up and found that My feet were out Sb igobupiand Tucked the covers In at the foot of The bed and got back n and found that ora only Came to my waist And so I pulled them up And found that my Feet were out again And so I got up And— Oh, well, go Back to the Beginning in. —IWilliams Purple Cow. 3 He—Saw Minnie with her new bathing suit under her arm. She—Is that the latest style?—Stan- ford Chapparal. sae A Mercenary Miss HERE was a young maid from Ky., Who considered herself very'ly:, When she married a guy Who piled shekels skuy-huy, But to choose’ sucli a face, she was ply. —Yale Record. IN Jont it strange that a fellow will i sif up most of YWANZAMGING the night with oN N Z) A PAIK my ps VARIA NSA amouthfull of NAYS” hair — \Vhen he finds one lone hair inthe soup~! well thats different: