Judge — July 8, 1922 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

With the College Wits Irrepressible, Joyous, Irresponsible Hilda and the Palm Tree Hmpa was a gentle deb, Modest and sweet and shy, And nary a thought of wickedness Did her innocence belie. She smoked, she drank forsooth, She even parked a bit, For her retiring nature oft Did make a potent hit. Now at a ball not long ago Was Hilda tanked and hot; Her frock was casual and brief; The back of it was not. An amorous palm tree by the door Somehow caught that dress— Poor Hilda stood and shivered there In hosiery or less. A gasp, a pause, then Hilda said: “Tis an optical illusion. “My costume’s meager, to be sure, “But I'm covered—with confusion!” L'Envoi So all you blushing débutantes Take heed to this girl's game— And though you find you're off your aisle Be Hildas just the same. —Harvard Lampoon. Has “Let me introduce Mr. Fish, he is an expert swimmer.” “Ah, yes, take him down and let him enjoy himself in the pool room!"— Penn State Froth. CHEMISTRY EXPERIMENT Find the freezing point. —Ohio Wesleyan Mirror. “That girl is a regular third rail.” “How's that?” “It's dangerous to touch her."—Utah Subjected. Rejected. Vital Statistics for Vacation ORTY-EIGHT students will have developed anzmia, necessitating their departure from college a week early. 3,002 papers will be called in. 1,200,667 nerves will be on edge. 868 text-books will be packed in 434 trunks, to be studied over vacation. Of these: 867 will remain in trunks. 1 will be left on train. 1,600 students will burble, “Hope you have a good vacation.” 1,600 students will respond, “Same to you.” 112 students will wear flowers, the gift of roommates. 112 students will have sent flowers to the above-mentioned roommates. 485 students will depart in tweed suits. Of these: 244 will be lavender. 70 will be blue. 171 will be other colors. 986,443 kisses will take place at the Wellesley station. Of these: 27 will be sincerely desired. 699,000 billion bacteria of a deadly nature will be thereby conveyed.— Wellesley College News. Sas 1925—Why do you upperclassmen always refer to the co-eds as peaches? 1922—The more you handle them the mushier they get.—Pennsylvania Punch Bowl. Dejected. —Yale Record. comicbooks.com